Broken
by scatterthestars
Summary: He was going to tell him and be done with it. But when things change, and Chris still finds his teacher, Darren still in his life, he deals with the curveball that life throws him. And it's when he seeks comfort from the person he loves is when rules that aren't meant to be broken are. Crisscolfer
1. Chapter 1

Rapidly tapping his pencil against his notebook, chewing his lower lip out of nerves, Chris debates with himself if this is a smart idea. He weighs the pros and cons of what he's about to do.

There are many pros to this. The big one being that it gets this weight he's been carrying around for the past year and a half off his chest.

The con, of course, being he is more than likely going to make a big fool of himself in front of the one person he desires.

But, in the end, he's been set on doing this for some time now. And he's going to follow through. He's gathering his courage and he's doing this. Nothing is going to stop him. He's fighting through all the nerves he is currently feeling to do this. Hell, he might faint or end up puking, but that won't stop him from saying what he needs to.

Hearing the ring of the bell overhead-officially announcing the end of the school year-Chris smiles at his friend, Linden, before she walks off after he tells her he has something to do. Seeing her eagerness to leave and be done with school for the next two and a half months, he doesn't want to hold her back for longer than need be.

Stuffing his notebook in his backpack and standing up, he places the straps on his shoulders. Taking a deep breath, and clearing his mind, he walks to the front of the room.

Being hopelessly in love with a teacher wasn't something he planned. He's only seventeen and has yet to experience the world. But from the first moment he laid eyes on Mr. Criss all those many months ago, he's been a goner.

The curly hair, the green eyes, the smile that makes him lose all train of thoughts when he smiles towards him. It's a combination of many things, and it all resulted in him falling in love. He knows Darren is almost eleven years older than him; that he might have a boyfriend. Hell, he could be engaged! But Chris doesn't care. He still loves him.

"Hey, Chris," Darren excitedly greets him as he continues to stack and arrange papers in a neat pile. "What are you still doing here? Shouldn't you be off with your fellow classmates celebrating the start of summer?"

"I should be. God knows Linden is ecstatic summer is here." He nervously laughs. Twirling a piece of loose thread from his shirt around his finger, he digs up the courage to say what he needs to. "I actually wanted to tell you goodbye. I know you're leaving for New York next week to start your new job."

Chris remembers his heart dropping when Darren informed them a little over a month ago that he was leaving this job for New York. He wanted him here; wanted him where he could see him every day during school. But, be it as it may, it's not his choice to get what he wants.

The only good thing with Darren leaving is that he can confess his feelings without worry of having to see him again.

"Thanks." Darren beams at him, stopping his paper shuffling and giving him all his attention. "I am. I'm excited."

"You were a wonderful teacher, Mr. Criss," Chris tells him.

"Thank you. And call me Darren. I'm not your teacher anymore." Darren places his hands on his hips, tilting his head a bit to the side.

"Well, since you're no longer my teacher, I figure it's safe for me to say this." Chris nervously smiles at Darren as he shuffles his feet.

"Say what?"

"I'm in love with you," Chris just blurts, not wanting to wait another second at keeping his secret. Instantly, he sees the grin fall from Darren's face as he drops his hands from his hips. In his eyes, Chris makes out a mixture of fear, and what he thinks is hope. But he can't be all too sure on that.

"Chris?" Darren says in low, soft voice, sounding like he's unsure of what to say. "You don't know what you're talking about."

"Yeah, I think I do."

"No, you don't." Darren shakes his head.

"Why, because I'm seventeen? I might be young, but I know how I feel towards you is real."

"What do you expect me to say to that, Chris? Oh, I've harbored feelings for you all this time, as well. I hope you don't expect to hear that."

"I don't expect you to say anything," Chris spits out, anger starting to swim through his veins. This is not how he thought this would go. Yeah, he didn't expect Darren to return his feelings. But, he also didn't expect him to be an asshole about it. "I did this for me. To get this off my chest. I never wanted to hear you say you felt the same."

"Well, good, because I'm not gonna go along with your school-boy crush."

"I'm gonna go. I don't know what I was thinking. Goodbye, Mr. Criss," Chris says in anger and frustration.

Turning and bolting out of the room, he runs down the hall to the door.

"Chris, wait!" he hears Darren yell from behind him.

Ignoring Darren, and forcing himself not to cry, Chris runs outside and stops. Taking a deep breath to calm his racing heart, he spots Linden leaning against her car parked next to his. Going over, he does everything to forget what happened; he pushes away the feelings of heartache so Linden doesn't ask what's wrong.

"You ready to leave this all behind for the next two and a half months?" Linden asks when he stops in front of his car.

"Yes." Unlocking his car, he climbs behind the wheel and starts the car. Chris feels as a single tear rolls down his face. In front of him, walking outside, he sees as Darren spots him. But refusing to acknowledge him, he drives away. "Yes," he whispers to himself as he drives away from the person who just broke his heart.

* * *

After revealing to Darren how he felt about him, and subsequently fleeing out of his classroom after their...fight (he figures that's the best word for it), Chris spends his summer vacation forgetting it ever happened.

He hangs out with Linden most of the time.

They do typical things like go to the movies, hang out at the mall, stay nights at each other's homes, and all other stuff. It's a summer of being teenagers and having fun.

It's what he needs. He needed time to get over what happened. He needed away from the pain he felt. Spending that first week of summer locked away in his room crying into his pillow was relieving, but he didn't want to spend his summer feeling pathetic. So after that week, all he gave himself to get over the pain, he pulled himself together and moved on.

If Linden ever wondered what went on that first week, she never questions him on it. He's grateful to her about that. Grateful she gave him the space he needed without having to ask her.

Afterwards, they spend the rest of summer practically glued to the other's hip. And he has fun. He's carefree.

But the end of summer comes too fast; and before he knows it the first day of his last year of high school sneaks up on him.

* * *

He hates first days of school. Body still set on summer vacation time, and wanting to go back home and sleep, he groans as he drops his forehead to his new locker; hearing a small bang ring out at the contact.

"Hey, Lin," he softly gripes, wondering who she bribed to get their lockers next to each other. "Do me a favor and shoot me. Spare me the misery of another school year."

"No can do, Chris," Linden says with a voice too bubbly for eight o'clock in the morning. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees her apply some chapstick. "It's our senior year. Time to have fun."

"Fun? We have fun," he replies, turning to her. "We have lots of fun."

"I mean besides talk shit about other students." Linden arches an eyebrow at him.

"There's nothing wrong with that," Chris cheekily responds, grinning at her. He lifts his head from the locker. "So, what does fun...mean? Include?"

"I'm not entirely sure about that, yet. But when I figure it out, I'll tell you." Seeing Linden close her locker and lift her bag strap over her shoulder, Chris loops his arm through her offered one. "Come on, we'll be late for English."

Walking down the crowded hallway, ignoring the glares and comments thrown his way, he counts the days until the end of the school year. "How did you manage to get us in three classes together?" he asks as they turn a corner and walk down the hall to their classroom.

"I have my ways," Linden replies with a grin.

"Whatever you say." Chris chuckles. Walking into his English class, not really in the mood for the start of classes, he stops dead in his tracks at who stands at the front of the room. His laughter immediately dies on his lips.

Looking cute as ever, Darren wears jeans and a white button-up shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Glasses sitting perched on his nose make him even sexier.

This is like a nightmare come to life. This can't be happening to him. Never in a million years did he think he would see Darren again. He doesn't get it. Doesn't understand why he's here when he should be in New York.

Why?

"Linden? You know how I jokingly asked you to shoot me?" As Chris talks, he keeps his attention on Darren as he continues to read the papers in his hand. He hears Linden reply with a yeah. "This time I'm not joking. Shoot me."

"What?" Linden asks confused.

Quickly taking a seat at the back of the class; and sitting behind a guy much bigger than him so he can be hidden. Dropping his forehead to the top of the desk, realizing he needs to stop doing that if he doesn't want a headache, he wonders who he pissed off to have this happen to him.

"Alright, class," Darren says with a voice loud enough to be heard over the students talking after the bell rings. "I'll take attendance and then talk about the elephant in the room."

Chris cowers and hides, listening as Darren calls the names before him. Hearing him call Linden's name, then John's, he knows his name is next.

"Ch-" He hears Darren clear his throat. "Chris?"

Maybe if he shuts his eyes and wishes hard enough, he'll wake up from this terrible nightmare. Maybe this will all go away.

"Chris?" Darren calls again.

He opens his eyes. "Damn, still here," he mutters under his breath. Linden gives him a confused look. "Here." He raises his arm to show where he is.

After that, Darren finishes taking attendance. "Okay," he says. "You're all probably wondering the same thing."

A collective of "Yeahs" ring out in the room.

"Well, New York was a bust. Turns out that wasn't for me. What I wanted is here."

Chris rolls his eyes at where his head is still on the desk. He doesn't understand why Darren just doesn't say he was fired or something? Not that it wasn't for him. New York is for everybody looking to get out of here. So, it most definitely was for him.

Staying hidden behind the boy that sits in front of him, Chris spends the rest of the class with his head on his desk avoiding looking up at Darren.

When the bell rings signaling the end of class, he's bolting up and quickly exiting the room as fast as he can.

"Hey, Chris," Darren says to catch his attention as he hurriedly leaves.

"Bye, Mr. Criss," Chris mumbles over his shoulder.

Going to his locker, and throwing it open a bit more forcefully than he means to, Chris shoves his book in his locker.

"You know Mr. Criss kept looking at you," Linden says next to him as she grabs her Physics text book.

"What?!" Chris looks at her like she just something in a different language.

"Yeah." She nods her head and zips up her backpack. "He kept looking at you. Like...a lot. It looked like he wanted to tell you something. Why would he be doing that?" Linden is quiet for a few seconds, Chris noticing as she thinks something over. "What happened that last day of school a few months ago? I remember you staying after, and I'm assuming you talked to him. What did you two say?"

Chris freezes as Linden's question. He knows he can't tell her the truth. So, he decides it's best to not tell her anything. "Trust me," he mumbles as he slams his locker shut. "You don't want to know." Seeing the look of curiosity on Linden's face, Chris knows it's best if just walked away right now. "Look. I gotta go. Don't want to be late for Calculus. See you at lunch?"

"Definitely," Linden replies, nodding her head.

"Okay."

Walking away, Chris hopes with Darren back it doesn't create an unneeded tension between them. He hopes this year can go smoothly without problems.

For the first few days, he believes that's what's going to happen.

He manages to avoid Darren at all costs. Always arriving to class a few seconds before the bell rings, and always one of the first ones out of the room at the end of class, he manages to go the first two weeks of barely muttering a few words to him. And when he does talk it's because Darren calls on him during class for an answer.

That is, until, Darren changes things.

"Okay, class," Darren calls out after the bell rings Monday morning, leaning back against his desk. "I need an assistant for the year. I did this last year, as well. I'm asking you guys because you are seniors, just like my assistant last year. You'll just be helping me out by grading papers and nothing much else."

Chris remembers that. Recalls the girl, Kelsey, he thinks her name was, sitting with Darren the one day out of the week grading papers. He remembers being jealous of her. She got to be alone with Darren. It was all he ever wanted, and he found himself wishing it was him sitting in his classroom grading papers.

But now...He's not so sure. Writing a ten thousand page paper on a subject he hates sounds more appealing than that.

Around him, though, he hears as other students get excited at getting the chance to be Darren's assistant. He notices a few girls get a bit too excited at the idea. It's then he remembers that he's not the only one with a crush on teacher.

He's noticed over the years the way some of the girls have looked at Darren. It was almost like he was a bowl of milk and they were the hungry cats. He knows the look because he's positive he sported it a few times. But not anymore. He's keeping that under control. Darren is just another teacher to him. Nothing more.

"So, if you like to help me out," Darren says as he picks up a stack of papers from his desk, "grab one of these and fill it out. I'll announce who I've picked on Friday. Also, whomever I choose, know I will be giving them extra credit for this."

When the bell rings forty minutes later, Chris lingers long enough to see pretty much every girl grab a form to fill out, hopeful smiles on their faces. He also sees a few guys grab one. Rolling his eyes, he slings the strap of his bag across his chest and starts to walk out of the class. It's none of his business who grabs a form; he's not going to get jealous over the person who gets picked.

"Chris?" Darren suddenly calls his name.

Turning around, he lets out an annoyed sigh as he looks at Darren. "Yes?" he uninterestedly asks.

"You're not going to grab a form?" Darren stands up and grabs a single paper from the stack on his desk, stepping towards him.

"Do I have to?" Chris watches as Darren holds out the paper to him.

"No." Darren shakes his head. "But you might change your mind."

"I'm positive I won't."

"Take it. Just in case." Darren holds out his hand more.

Taking the piece of paper Chris turns on his heel and heads for the door. Stopping and looking over his shoulder, seeing Darren watching him, he crumples up the paper and drops it in the trash. Walking away, he lets out a small, frustrated sigh; he kind of wished he didn't just do that.

* * *

Dropping his last night's homework on top of the pile on Darren's desk, Chris ignores the smile he gives him. Even though he does his best to ignore him, he can't ignore how his heart flutters in his chest at the small, simple gesture.

Walking to his desk, he sits down and smiles at Linden, letting out a small laugh when he finds her reading Atonement.

"Nice book choice," he comments.

Linden looks at him and shrugs her shoulders. "It's good. The whole tragic love story is sad. But I'm enjoying it."

"Fucking Briony," Chris says.

"Fucking Briony," Linden repeats.

They both start laughing, ignoring the snide remarks the other students tell them.

"All right, class," Darren announces after the bell rings. "I'm guess you want to know who I've chosen."

A reply of yeahs is heard from the students.

Lying his head down on his folded arms on the table, Chris closes his eyes and starts to feel himself drift off to sleep. He couldn't care less about the person that was picked. All he cares about right now is this school day ending.

"Alright. Congrats, Chris," Darren announces. "You're my new assistant for the year."

Chris throws his eyes open and sits there in shock for a second. For awhile he can't think of anything. And when he does, all he can think is _"That asshole!" _and _"Yes!"_ at the same time; although the yes is drowned out more by the other thought.

He can't believe he did this.

Thinking about it, now, he figures the whole thing was rigged from the beginning. He assumes Darren just wanted to appear to be giving the other students the hope of getting picked. It was never going to happen. He had him picked from even before he announced this to the class. It's probably the main reason he wanted him to fill out a form, so he could choose him.

But he doesn't understand why.

"Hey, Chris, congrats." Linden gives him a playful shove on his shoulder when he sits up.

Ignoring the glares some of the girls throw him, Chris looks at Darren standing proud in the front of the classroom.

"Thanks." He finally manages to mumble to Linden after dropping his head to his desk with a small thunk.

Pissed for the rest of the class period, wanting the class to be over and gone for the weekend, he is relieved when the bell rings forty-five minutes later.

Grabbing his stuff, he starts to head out of the room. But he's stopped by Darren calling his name. "What?" he says angered and annoyed.

He can't believe Darren is doing this to him. Putting him through the embarrassment of being alone with him after what happened. It sucks. Right now, he wants nothing more than to go on avoiding Darren like he's been doing. And being alone with him for thirty minutes is something that he is going to dread.

"I'll see you Wednesday during lunch. Okay?" Darren tries to say in a comforting voice.

"Whatever." Chris turns and walks away, biting his lower lip to hold in the scream of frustration he wants to release.

* * *

Sitting half-way up the bleachers, half-heartedly eating his fries, Chris pays little attention as Linden ogles and talks about Matthew Avery down on the football field. He watches him for a few seconds; watches as he tosses a football back and forth between guys on the football team with him.

Watching him, Chris gets it. He's hot. Fit body, short, blonde hair, blue eyes, and a smile to knock them dead, he understands why Linden could find him attractive. Besides being the quarterback, he's mister popular around school. He's, personally, never talked to the dude-sees no reason why he should. But looking at the look of pure want in Linden's eyes, he figures he should give her a little nudge.

"You should go talk to him." He sets his fries down, no longer hungry.

"You're crazy." Linden snorts as she eats a fry. "He has no clue who I am."

"That doesn't mean anything. You never know, you two could hit it off." Chris tries to sound encouraging, giving Linden a small nudge to her shoulder.

"I'm pretty sure we wouldn't," Linden replies in a defeated sigh. "Besides, I think he has his eye on Johanna Staceson."

"That bimbo!" Chris exclaims. "You're so much better than her. And way prettier."

"Thanks. But, let's drop it." Linden leans back on the row of bleachers behind her, and lifting her legs and crossing her ankles on the row in front of her. "Besides, we should be talking about the fact that you're here when you should be in Mr. Criss' room right now."

"I'd rather not, thank you very much." Chris lets out a huff of breath, not in the mood to talk about the fact that he's here and not there.

"Why don't you want to be there?" Linden drops her feet and sits up, facing him.

"I just don't want to," Chris gripes. "He's not my favorite person in the world right now."

"What happened the last day of school?" Linden seriously asks again.

"Nothing." Standing up, Chris grabs his bag and places the strap over his shoulder. "I'm going. Bell is about to ring."

"Why won't you tell me, Chris?" Linden says as she follows him down the bleachers.

"Because there is nothing to tell," Chris replies, turning to face Linden when he reaches the bottom of the bleachers. "Nothing happened. Not a damn thing!"

"Why are you mad and yelling at me?" Chris sees the slight hurt filling Linden's chocolate colored eyes, and he feels like an asshole.

"Because," he sighs, "it's embarrassing what did happen."

"What happened?"

Linden is his best friend; he trusts her more than anything. That's why he decides to tell her what happened.

Plopping down on the first row of the bleachers, Linden sitting down next to him, he tells her everything. He tells her about how he feels, telling Darren, and how he reacted. He even tells her about being picked to be his helper when he didn't sign up for it.

"Wow!" It's the only thing Linden says after he finishes talking.

"Thanks for the support," Chris jokes, letting out a forced laugh.

"I'm sorry." Linden wraps an arm around his waist and gives him a comforting squeeze. "It's just that...It's all so crazy."

"I know." Chris nods his head in agreement. A few yards in front of them, Matthew catches the football one of his friends throws him. He's not sure if he's noticing things, but he swears he sees him look to Linden and smile. "Anyways," he says, going back to the subject on hand, "I'm not really up to being alone with him right now."

"Why do you think he picked you?" Linden questions with curiosity. "Maybe he does like you. Oh, my God! Could you imagine if that were the case and you two hooked up? Scandalous!"

"Aren't you supposed to talk me out of possibly ruining a man's life if that were to happen?" Chris chuckles; not all surprised by Linden's thoughts. "Besides, he made it pretty clear he doesn't see me as nothing more than his student."

"If it were to happen, though, hypothetically, let's just say...I'd pay to see the two of you make out."

"I'm not sure how I should take that," Chris says slightly confused.

"Hot," Linden whispers to herself with a far off look in her eyes; Chris knows she's imaging Darren and him making out.

Letting out a chuckle, he wishes Linden's imagination was his reality. But, as it, it's not.

Standing up, taking Linden with him, he links his arm through hers as they walk back to class.

"Seriously...Hot!" Linden grins at him and arches an eyebrow.

* * *

It's the first time he's early to class.

Walking into the room, finding only Darren inside sitting at his desk, Chris goes over to his desk. Dropping his bag to the floor and sitting down, he pulls out his phone and slumps some in his seat. Opening a game on his phone, he plays to avoid Darren.

Looking up when someone clears their throat, Chris finds Darren standing over him.

He might not like him very much at the moment, but that doesn't stop Chris from coming up short of breath when he looks at him. He's gorgeous, and Chris knows he'll always see him as that.

"Yes?" Chris says, managing to sound annoyed.

"Can I talk to you for a second?" Darren asks as he sits down in the desk in front of Chris, twisting to face him, arms crossed over the back of the seat.

"I guess so." Chris closes the game he was playing and places his phone on his desk.

"Where were you yesterday during lunch?"

"Eating lunch," Chris replies with snark.

"Why didn't you come to my classroom?"

"Was I supposed to?" Chris picks up his phone when Linden sends him a text saying she has something exciting to tell him; he acts like he doesn't know what Darren was talking about.

"You know you were supposed to come." As Darren talks, Chris sees as students start to trickle into the room.

"I didn't think it was mandatory," Chris tells him. "So I didn't come."

"It's not mandatory. But I would appreciate it if you showed up. So, I expect to see you during lunch next Wednesday," Darren says in a bit of a stern voice.

"Whatever." Chris rolls his eyes and watches him stand up and walk away when the kid whose desk he sits at walks into the room.

Noticing Linden walk into the room looking a little too happy, cup of coffee in her hand, Chris can see she has a bit of a bounce in her step.

"So, what's the great news?" he asks when she sits down.

"Guess who talked to me?" Linden giddily says.

"Who?"

"Matthew," Linden says with a bit of a squeal, wide grin on her face.

"Bullshit!" Chris is just as shocked as Linden. "What'd he say?"

Listening to Linden as she tells him about running into Matthew while getting coffee, he ignores Darren as he starts to teach. He smiles as she goes on and on about them just talking about nothing. But she sounds upset when she tells him he had to leave because Johanna was waiting for him in his car.

"Are they even together?" Chris questions.

"I don't know. I think so." Linden lets out a defeated sounding sigh, shrugging her shoulders. "At least he talked to me."

"Yeah." Chris nods his head.

Walking out at the end of class, Chris goes back when Darren calls his name. Stopping in front of his desk, he places his hands on his hips and arches his eyebrow. "Yes?" he says sounding annoyed.

"I'd really appreciate it if you paid attention in class," Darren chastises him. "Talking to Linden and playing games on your phone is not something you should be doing. I've asked around to your other teachers, and they tell me you are a perfect student. I'd like it if you were like that in my classroom."

"Fine, Mr. Criss," Chris sees the little jerk that goes through Darren at the name, "I'll be a perfect student. I'll be whatever you want." Forcing a fake smile, he turns on his heel and walks out of the room.

Gripping the strap of his bag so tight his knuckles turn white, he thinks about how he still wishes to be so much more than Darren's student.

* * *

Plopping down in his desk he sits at when he's in this class, noticing Darren isn't here he places his backpack on the desk and uses it as a pillow. Eyes starting to close, thinking he might get in some sleep, he groans when he hears the door close. Without lifting his head, Chris knows who it is.

"Come sit by my desk, Chris," Darren tells him in a calm, neutral voice.

Chris hears the drag of the chair against the floor as Darren pulls it out. Not moving, he ponders how much trouble he would get in if he just bolted right now.

He doesn't want to be here alone in this room with Darren. The only reason he puts up going to his class every morning is because he has to. If he had it his way, he would never step foot in this classroom, or see Darren, again.

Over the summer months, instead of being heartbroken over Darren leaving, which he was, don't get him wrong, he also started to loath the man he loves. After how he treated him after the confrontation in which he told him the truth, he wanted nothing more to do with him. He was glad he was out of his life for good.

But even that, how Darren acted and what he said to him, didn't stop him from having these feelings for him. He tried to stop. Tried to tell himself it was nothing. It was just a "stupid school-boy crush" as Darren called it. But he knew the truth. Knew it in the way he still came up short of breath at just the mere sight of Darren. How his heart would stop at that one half-smile he would wear that drives him crazy. How he couldn't hate him even though he should.

He might be seventeen, but he's pretty positive he is most definitely head over heels in love with his English teacher, and there is no changing that no matter how hard he tries.

"Chris!" Darren says a bit more sternly. "I told you something."

"And I heard you." Chris keeps his head on his backpack.

"How about you listen to me."

Letting out an annoyed groan and lifting his head, Chris stands up and grabs his bag. Walking to Darren's desk, he plops down in the chair next to it that faces the board. Holding his backpack in his lap, arms tightly wrapped around it, he keeps his eyes trained on the dry-erase board. Still written on it are lessons from previous classes. Out of his peripheral vision, he can see as Darren starts to pull out stacks of paper.

"Why am I here?" he grumpily asks as he drops his head back, now staring at the ceiling.

"You know why you're here."

"No, I don't. I have no clue why I'm here, considering I never even signed up to be your little assistant." Chris lifts his head and stares straight into Darren's eyes. "So, tell me why you choose me for something I didn't sign up for?"

Darren lets out a small huff of breath. "It's the only way I could think to get you alone," he admits.

"Why'd you need to do that?"

"I need to apologize for how I acted the last time we were alone." Darren carefully nudges the orange he sat down on his desk. Watching as it rolls up an inch and back to him, Chris can feel a fresh wave of embarrassment take over him at Darren bringing up their last time together. "I was rude, and out of line in some of the things I said. I shouldn't have treated you like that after you bravely did that. So, I'm sorry."

Chris sits there a bit dumbstruck. Is Darren being for real right now? There is no possible way this is happening. He never expected to have his teacher apologizing to him; but he has to admit it feels good to have Darren saying what he said. "Why do you think what I did was brave?" he asks as he drops his bag to the floor.

"Do you accept my apology?"

"Yeah," he nods his head; he figures it's time to forgive and forget, "but why do you think I was brave? I made a big fool out of myself."

"Not many people would have the courage to do what you did, Chris." Chris finds a cool shiver running through him at the way Darren says his name; voice sounding like how soft silk skimming over bare skin feels. "God knows I wouldn't have been brave enough."

Seeing a hint of regret quickly flash across Darren's eyes, Chris wonders what that is in relation to. "Who didn't you tell?" He knows there has to be someone Darren kept from telling his true feelings if he said that.

"That," Darren says, "is none of your business."

"What was his name? Can I ask that?" Chris sees Darren look at him with wide eyes filled with shock and surprise. He figures Darren wants to know how he knows about his secret he keeps from people at school. "I heard you talking, quite angrily and loudly, I might add, with who I can safely assume is your ex."

"How do you know it wasn't a girl?"

"Because I'm pretty sure she would have changed her name from Jacob." Chris holds Darren's stare. A few seconds later he starts to laugh when Darren lets out a loud chuckle.

"You caught me," Darren admits with a small laugh.

"Don't worry, I won't tell."

"Thanks."

"So, you gonna tell me his name? The name of the guy you didn't tell how you felt."

"That's still none of your business," Darren informs him.

"Don't worry. I'll get you to tell me. I love a challenge." Chris grins at him to show him he is being serious.

"Well, while you do that," Darren starts off, pushing a pile of papers toward him. "Help me grade these."

"Yes, sir," Chris says in a fake serious voice, laughing when Darren shakes his head in amusement.


	2. Chapter 2

**Warnings for a mention of character death.**

* * *

Staring at the display of his digital clock, watching the numbers change, Chris can't remember how long he's been laying here. He tried sleeping, but like the past few days he just tossed and turned; the most he's slept is a combined hour and half during the night.

Watching as the number on the clock changes to show it is now seven-thirty, he figures he might as well get out of bed and go downstairs.

Doing that after brushing his teeth and splashing his face with cold water to fully wake him up, he finds his mom in the kitchen leaning back against the counter. Based on the small sniffles and how she has her face covered, he knows she's crying.

It's been like that since it happened a few days ago. He finds her alone and crying. She tries her hardest to be strong in front of Hannah and him, but the moment she's alone he knows she lets it all go. She lets go of the facade she puts up for them and cries.

Unlike him. He has yet to cry. And he doesn't know why. Maybe it's to be strong for his mom and Hannah. Maybe it's because it has yet to fully hit him what happened. He's not sure.

"Mom," he quietly says. He sees her lift her head and wipe away the tears; forcing a smile.

"Hey, Chris," she says with a slightly quivering voice. "Why are you up so early on a Saturday?"

"I couldn't sleep." He walks over and pulls down the box of Fruit Loops and grabs a bowl.

"Oh, honey," his mom says. "We ran out of milk. Give me a minute and I'll run out to buy some real quick."

"Don't worry about it, Mom," he tells her. "I'll go. I'll be back before Hannah wakes up."

"Thanks, sweetie." Chris closes his eyes as his mom pulls him into a tight hug and kisses the top of his head. "Thanks."

"No problem." Letting her go, he grabs his shoes and keys and leaves. He doesn't even care that he's still in his pajamas.

* * *

Standing in the middle of the aisle in front of the milk, mind completely somewhere else, he doesn't take notice of the person walking towards him.

He doesn't know how long he's been standing there, how long he's been in a daze of regret and denial. It seems so unreal to him that this happened to him; that something this horrible could happen to his family. It seemed as if it would always be the four of them for years to come; but now that's gone. And somehow, standing there and staring at milk, it is all hitting him that that is gone.

"Chris?" He hears his name being called by a familiar voice.

"We...We ran out of milk," he mumbles to Darren, keeping his vision straight ahead. "My sister likes to eat Lucky Charms in the morning. I don't want her to be more upset than she already is. I...I told my mom I'd come buy some for her."

"Chris?" Darren softly says again.

Closing his eyes when Darren takes his hand, he knows he can't look at him without breaking.

"Chris, look at me."

Finally turning his gaze to Darren it all crumbles. Eyes immediately fill with tears that spill over. It's the first time he's crying since it happened; it's the first time it feels like his heart is being ripped from his chest. The pain is unbearable; he wants it to go away. He wants to be numbed to what he's feeling.

"It...It hurts s-so bad," he sobs as he clutches a hand to his chest.

"It's okay," Darren comfortingly murmurs when he pulls him close. "It's okay, Chris."

Burying his face in the curve of Darren's neck, sobs wracking his body, and crying like he'll never stop, he lets himself break. He lets himself feel what he pushed back to ignore. He lets himself be held and touched for the first time in days.

Clutching tight to Darren's jacket as he's tightly held, he wants to stay in Darren's arms until its better. Even if that might take forever, he wants to stay here.

"I...I don't know w-what to do. I just...just want the pain gone." Chris' voice is shaken and cracks; he barely manages to talk without a sob falling from his lips every few seconds. "I...I ca-can't breathe."

He knows he's panicking; he's getting scared after letting all the emotions in at once. It feels like he's been hit by a tidal wave and he's being tossed and tumbled under the water desperate to breathe.

"Shh," Darren softly whispers into his ear. "It's okay. Just focus on me. Listen to the sound of my breathing and do the same. Slowly breathe in and out."

Doing as he was told, instantly flooded with the scent of the citrus that Darren smells of, he focuses on that. The smell of oranges brings in memories of Darren and he happily talking during one of their Wednesday lunch that they've shared so far. Breathing in and out, letting those memories take over, slowly becoming calmer by the minute, he loosens his tight hold of Darren's shirt.

He kind of expected to lose it at some time. He just never thought it would happen at seven in the morning in the dairy aisle of the store as his English teacher holds him.

He doesn't know how long they stand there, and he doesn't care. The comfort of Darren's embrace is better than anything he's felt in days.

But knowing his mom will start to worry, and Hannah might be up, he knows he has to let go.

"I have to go. My mom will be worried." Reluctantly pulling away from Darren, instantly missing his warmth, Chris runs his hands over his face. Opening the glass door and grabbing a carton of milk, he looks back to Darren and forces a smile. "Bye, Mr. Criss."

"Chris." Darren takes Chris' wrist and stops him from walking away. "I'm here. If you ever need anything. If you need to talk to somebody. I'm here."

"Okay." Sniffling and feeling a tear roll down his cheek, he weakly smiles and walks away.

Being held by Darren made it less painful, but he still feels as if the pain will never leave.

* * *

Walking into school Monday morning and going to his locker, arms immediately wrap around him and pull him into a tight, comforting embrace.

"You didn't have to come," Linden quietly tells him.

"I know." Chris lets himself be held a bit longer before pulling away. "But I needed to get out of the house."

"How's your mom?" Linden takes his hand and starts to walk with him to their class.

"She's strong around everybody. But I hear her cry when she's alone."

Before Linden has a chance to say anything, they walk into Darren's classroom. Weakly smiling at Darren, he walks to his desk in the back. Dropping his bag on the desk and sitting down, he crosses his arms over his bag and lays his head down.

During class, he barely pays attention. Darren doesn't tell him anything about sitting there and doing absolutely nothing. He tries sleeping, but finds he can't just like all previous nights.

When the bell rings, he makes sure to take his time leaving. Needing to talk to Darren, he tells Linden bye and walks to his desk.

"Hey, Mr. Criss," Chris mumbles as he stops in front of Darren.

"Chris, how are you doing?" Darren sincerely asks.

"A bit better. It still hurts like hell."

"I'm so sorr-"

"Please, don't apologize," Chris cuts him off. "I've heard enough people apologize already. I just...I just need..."

"What do you need?"

How does he say he needs to be held by Darren like in the store aisle? How does he say that being in Darren's arms has brought him the most comfort in these past horrible days? How does he say that he simply needs Darren? How does he go about asking for that without being rejected? Because he knows Darren will tell him no; tell him he can't because they are in school, and to do that would go against school policy.

And being rejected right now is something he doesn't need.

So, he decides to just talk about something else.

"I just need to know it's going to be okay?"

"It will be. Eventually," Darren tells him. "Little by little it'll get easier. Then one day you'll wake up and it won't hurt as bad; you'll be able to go on living without wanting to cry all the time."

"Thanks." Chris smiles and wipes away the tear that rolls down his cheek. "How long did it take you?"

"It's different for everybody, Chris," Darren says.

"Who was it?"

"My grandma. I was twenty-two when she passed. We were really close."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize. Like you, I heard it enough from people. But thanks anyways."

"I should go." Chris wraps his fingers around the strap of his bag and grips tight. "Also, I wanted to tell you that I won't be here tomorrow. So, whatever assig-"

Darren holds up his hand to stop him. "Don't worry about it. Can I ask why you won't be here?"

"It's the funeral. Then I have to endure more apologies, afterwards, at home." Chris feels a warmth in his chest when Darren comfortingly smiles at him and says he hopes he is okay. It's then he, somehow, knows it will be all okay one day.

* * *

Rain slowly drizzles down around him and the other people here as they lower the casket into the ground. His clothes are damp and he doesn't care. Clutched tightly in his hands is a bouquet of flowers. The tissue paper they are wrapped in is wet and torn. Dropping them on the mound of dirt, he walks away.

Climbing into his car and driving home, tired and numb, he huffs when all the cars of people already there come into view.

It's not that he hates them, or that he's mad. He just does not want to have to deal with the somber mood and sad looks. For almost a week it's been that when people visited. And he's had enough.

Sitting on the edge of his bed in his room an hour and a half later after going inside, repeatedly hitting the play button on the screen of his phone to hear the last voicemail his dad left him, Chris hears his bedroom door open. "Mom," he whispers with a broken voice. "I told you I wanted to be alone."

Listening to the heavy footfalls that come towards him, he looks up when someone sits next to him. Seeing Darren there in a simple black suit, a single white rose in his hand, Chris feels a bit of the darkness that's been surrounding him be pushed out by bright light.

"Sorry, I'm not your mom. I didn't know." Darren lifts his hand and brushes a few wet strands of Chris' hair back from his face. "I can go if you want."

"No. Stay here. It's okay." Chris feels a warmth and an ache both form in his chest at having Darren here. "What are you doing here?"

"I asked Principal Keirnan if I could leave to come here. I knew you would need somebody."

"Thank you." Squeezing Darren's hand when he takes his, Chris never wants to let go. The touch of Darren's hand keeps him anchored and makes him feel safe.

"Is there anything I can do?" Chris nods his head at knowing exactly what Darren can do. "What?"

"I need you to hold me."

"Chris, I don't thi-"

"Please." Wrapping an arm around Darren's neck and hugging him close, Chris already feels a bit better. "I'm so tired, Darren. I'm so tired. I can't sleep, and...Please, Darren, hold me until I fall asleep."

Fresh tears spring to his eyes when he feels Darren pull away. Dropping his head when he stands up off the bed, Chris doesn't blame him for wanting to leave. He would probably react the same way if he had someone he shouldn't be that close to on him.

Lying on his bed and bringing his knees to his chest, Chris hears the door softly close. Closing his eyes and wishing it was different, he wonders how much more pain he can deal with.

Breathing when Darren lies down behind him and pulls him close, feeling the pain ebb, he turns around to face him. "Thank you," he softly mumbles.

"Rest, Chris," Darren says as he soothingly strokes his thumb over Chris' cheek, wiping away a tear. "I'll hold you."

Chris doesn't care that Darren shouldn't be here. He doesn't care that they could potentially get in big trouble if caught. He doesn't care about any of that. All he cares about is being held. Burying his face in the curve of Darren's neck, breathing in the scent of citrus on his skin, he tentatively wraps his arm around Darren's side and grabs his shoulder.

"You didn't have to do this," he mumbles against Darren's suit jacket that is slightly damp from the rain.

"I know. But I can see the tiredness in your eyes. If this is what it takes for you to get some sleep, I'll willingly do it."

Being held by Darren, breathing in the smell of oranges, it doesn't take long for Chris to fall asleep.

When he wakes up several hours later still feeling tired, he grabs the pillow Darren used. Burying his nose in the pillow, the smell of Darren strong, he drifts back to sleep clutching the pillow in his arms.

* * *

He goes back to school the next day. Going through the motions of walking to class and doing work keep him preoccupied enough to help him forget for a few hours.

At lunch, he walks to Darren's classroom. Finding him sitting at his desk with a cup of coffee and an orange, going over work, he lightly wraps on the door frame.

"Hey, Chris." Darren smiles and stands up.

"Need help?" Chris walks into the room and pulls a chair up to the side of Darren's desk.

"You don't have to. I didn't remind you because I thought you wouldn't want to."

"I know," Chris says. "But I need...normalcy. I need to do things that make me forget for a bit."

"Alright." Darren sits back down and slides over a stack of ungraded quizzes. "However many you can," he tells Chris.

"Thanks." Grabbing a small pile, Chris goes about grading and forgetting for several minutes.

Its twenty minutes later when Darren asks, "Have you eaten? You didn't bring your lunch."

"I'm not very hungry." It's the truth. The past few days, he hasn't had much of an appetite. He's barely eaten much of anything for several days.

"When's the last time you ate, Chris?"

"Um...yesterday afternoon," Chris softly whispers.

"I know you don't have much of an appetite right now," Darren says as he starts to peel the orange he has. "I was the same. But you have to eat, Chris. It doesn't help if you don't eat. Sorry, it's all I have on hand," Darren says as he holds out the orange.

"Okay." Taking the half of the orange Darren offers him, Chris pulls off a segment and eats it. "Thank you," he says after finishing the orange.

"For what?" Darren asks slightly confused.

"For being there right now. For helping me through this hard time."

"I know how hard it is," Darren softly tells him. "It's good to have someone to talk to and be there."

"Do...Would it be okay if I came in here during lunch?" Chris tentatively asks. "It's...It's easier here."

"Yes. But you have to promise me something."

"What?"

"Bring a lunch. A big one." Darren smiles.

Chris grins as he agrees and nods his head.

* * *

The next day, a few food items in hand, Chris walks to Darren's room. Letting himself in when he finds it empty, he sets his food down and pulls up the chair next to the desk. Sitting down and eating a grape, he smiles when he sees Darren walk into the room.

"Good to see you stick to your promise." Darren sets his usual cup of coffee and orange down on his desk as he takes a seat.

"Perhaps I should force you to actually eat something." Chris arches an eyebrow at Darren's choice of food. "I never see you eat actual food."

"This is actual food," Darren says as he holds up his orange.

"I meant something that would fill you up."

"I'm fine with my orange." Darren smiles as he starts to peel the orange.

The smell of the orange assaults Chris' senses and has him remembering the way Darren smelled when he held him. The strong, fresh, citrusy smell that covered Darren and had him wanting to stay in that moment forever; that brings comfort and warmth attached to it.

Shaking his head and coming out of thoughts of Darren holding him while in bed, Chris unwraps his sandwich. Grabbing half a slice, he holds it out for Darren. "Here," he says. "Food to fill you up a bit."

"No." Darren shakes his head, pushing Chris' hand away. "I want to see you eat more than half a sandwich. I told you, I'm fine with my orange."

* * *

"I have something for you." Chris says it the moment Darren walks into his room holding his usual lunch of a coffee and orange. Picking up his bag from the floor and opening the flap, Chris grabs the brown paper bag inside. Setting it down on the desk next to Darren, he grins. "Enjoy."

"What is it?" Darren takes the bag as he asks, unfolding the folded over top. Chris lets out a small laugh when Darren looks at what's inside and chuckles. "Thanks," he tells him as he pulls out the Lunchable.

"You're welcome. Considering the circumstances, I had to go with something that wouldn't go bad."

"I see you got the one with chocolate chip cookies," Darren points out as he starts to peel the plastic back. "Would you like one?"

Chris shakes his head as Darren holds out the small plastic container with the food. "I have my own." He pulls out a plastic sandwich bag from his school bag. "Made them yesterday."

"How come you get the homemade and I'm stuck with the processed stuff?" Darren teases as he grabs a cracker from his Lunchable.

"Here." Chris grabs one of his cookies and holds it out for Darren, who takes it. "Tell me if you like it."

"You didn't have to give me one. I was just joking."

"I know." Chris watches as Darren takes a bite and lets out a soft moan (which makes him blush and lose all coherent thought for a few seconds) and smiles when Darren gives him a thumbs up.

"It's delicious," Darren says.

"Thanks," Chris proudly replies with a smile.

It's then that he realizes he's genuinely smiled because he's happy for the first time since before it happened. Being here with Darren, talking and eating, is making him happy, and leaves him feeling less sorrowful.

* * *

"Do you think dogs actually go to heaven?"

"What?" Darren asks as he turns his attention away from the tests he was grading.

"Last night, I was watching _All Dogs Go To Heaven_ with my sister, and it had me wondering."

"If dogs go to heaven?"

"Yeah, that, and if there is a heaven just for dogs?"

"I'm sure there is."

"I had a dog when I was younger that my dad accidentally ran over when he was backing out of the driveway. I was so mad at him that I didn't speak to him for a week." Chris stops talking and thinks about his dad. A pain he wishes he could forget starts all over again in his chest.

"Chris?"

Lifting his head when Darren says his name, a small shiver runs through him when Darren reaches over and wipes away the tear that falls with his thumb.

"If there is a heaven for dogs, then there has to be a heaven, right?" Chris wipes away the other tear that falls. Lifting his legs and putting his knees to his chest, feet on the edge of the chair, arms wrapped around his legs, he lays his head on his knees. "I just want to...believe he's somewhere peaceful."

"After my grandmother died I refused to believe she was anywhere else. As long as you believe he's somewhere peaceful, whether or not that place exists, then he is."

"Thanks." Chris weakly smiles.

"You're welcome."

"Darren?"

Chris notices Darren immediately pull back from him-even though he was barely leaning over to him. He sees him turn his attention to the person at the door; based on the voice, he guesses it to be Mrs. Hamilton.

"Mrs. Hamilton," Darren says sounding caught off guard with a shaky voice. "How may I help you?"

"The copy machine is stuck, and you helped me last time. I was wondering if it wouldn't be such an inconvenience if you could fix it." Mrs. Hamilton asks with her soft, low voice.

Keeping his head resting on his knees and turned to Darren, Chris doesn't care or want to move. At the moment, he doesn't care that his History teacher just caught Darren and he considering they weren't doing anything wrong.

He smiles at Darren, noticing the small upturn of Darren's lips at the corner of his mouth.

"I wouldn't mind." Chris watches as Darren stands up.

"Thank you so much!"

Chris tries to stay as long as possible after leaves the room, but he ends up having to leave. He gets a bit upset at not being able to see Darren again before the school day ends. But he's happy at knowing there's always tomorrow.

* * *

"Where do you eat lunch now?" Linden asks him a few mornings later as they stand in front of their lockers. She has her arms wrapped around her text book and a notebook. "I'm just curious, by the way. One day you're there, and the next you're suddenly gone. I just want to know where you go, and why you left."

Knowing he doesn't need to lie, and doesn't want to, Chris figures it's easiest to tell her what she wants to know. "I eat with Mr. Criss." The instant he says it, he sees Linden's eyes go wide and an excited grin spread across her face. "Don't get excited, Lin. It's nothing. We just eat and talk."

"What kind of talk are we talking about?" Linden wiggles her eyebrows and laughs.

"Talking talking," Chris tells her as he closes his locker. "We just talk about stuff; nothing important or life changing."

"Alright," Linden says as she loops her arm through Chris', accepting his answer. "But you know you can talk to me if you ever need to. I know it's been difficult for you these past two weeks; just know I'm here. If you ever need to talk about anything, I'm here."

"Thanks, Lin."

* * *

It's the seventh time he is spending his lunch in Darren's room. Eating a bag of Cheetos, holding out the bag to Darren who takes a couple, he lifts his legs and sits cross-legged on the chair.

"Why did you want to be a teacher?" he asks Darren as he opens the bottle of water he has.

"Would you believe me if I told I didn't want to?"

"No." Chris laughs. "You're too good at your job. What happened?"

"Thanks. And senior year of high school happened," Darren answers.

"Elaborate," Chris says.

"I was asked to help tutor a kid in one of my classes. It was while I was doing that, seeing as I could help another person understand something they didn't before, I realized I really enjoyed what I was doing."

"What did you want to do before?"

"I was leaning towards medicine of some sorts."

"So, there could have been a chance of you being my doctor instead of my teacher?"

"Yes." Darren chuckles as he nods his head. "I would be giving you prescriptions instead of homework."

"Funny how life works," Chris comments, grabbing another Cheeto.

"Yeah. Funny." Darren nods his head. "But there would have been a problem to keep me from going into medicine if I wanted to. So, it's a good thing I wanted to be a teacher in the end."

"What thing?" Chris curiously asks.

"I'm not telling you. It's embarrassing."

"How embarrassing?"

"Very," Darren replies with a small chuckle.

* * *

Lunch in hand, happy and eager to see Darren, he heads for his classroom. When he reaches it, he's surprised to find his door closed. Turning the knob, he's even more surprised at finding the door locked. Peering into the small window and seeing the lights off and room empty, he doesn't understand what's going on.

Stepping to the side and sliding down against the wall, not wanting to go back to the cafeteria, he eats and waits for Darren. As he finishes his apple, he sees him walking down the hall looking a bit upset.

"Hey," he happily greets him when he's close as he stands up. "Where were you? I've been waiting out here all lunch."

"I need to speak with you, Chris." Darren unlocks his door and opens it.

Going inside the too quiet room, light flooding the room when Darren flips the switch, Chris throws away the last of his food. Standing there as Darren walks over to his desk, he clutches the strap of his bag. "So," he worriedly says, "what did you need to talk to me about?"

"You can't come here for lunch anymore."

The small smile Chris had completely falls away. "Why?"

"Principal Kiernan pulled me into his office. Apparently, someone informed him of our lunch time spent together. He warned me and told me to stop immediately."

"We...We're not even doing anything wrong!" Chris complains, holding back from yelling. But that doesn't stop anger from running through him. "We just talk and eat."

"I know, Chris. But even that is too much for us to be doing." Darren lets out a small sigh. It's then that Chris notices how tense he is; he can see the anger in his eyes, and that confuses him. Chris doesn't understand why Darren should be angry over this; then he realizes he must be angry over getting in trouble. "Chris, you're my student. I'm your teacher. We can't blur the lines more than they already have."

"I just don't understand." Chris takes a step back from Darren. "I came here because it was easier; I could talk to someone who knew what I was going through. And now...Now you're pushing me away because it's the proper thing? I thought you understood how much I needed someone to be there?"

"I do. I do, Chris," Darren says, taking a step to closer to Chris. "I just can't be that person anymore. I can't do that without getting in trouble."

"We were just talking," Chris murmurs, not getting what's so wrong about that. Yeah, he can see how two people having lunch together each day might be taken wrong. But he and Darren were doing nothing against the rules. "Did you tell him that? Did you tell him you were helping me?"

"Yes." Darren nods his head. "But he told me that wasn't my job. I'm your teacher and nothing more."

Fighting back tears, Chris nods his head in understanding.

"Chris?" Darren says to get his attention.

"Yeah?" he softly replies.

"You still have Linden."

"She doesn't understand like you." A single tear rolls down Chris' cheek; he brings a hand up and wipes it away. He hates that this is getting to him so much, that he's crying. "I'm sorry for getting you in trouble. I'll be here during lunch on Wednesday. Is that still okay?"

"Yeah." Darren takes another step to Chris. "I'm sorry, Chris. I didn't mean to hurt you."

"It's okay. Don't apologize. I understand." Smiling and walking out of the room, Chris feels a small dread wash over him. "Bye, Mr. Criss. I'll see you tomorrow."

He really loved looking forward to spending the lunch time he had with Darren. Now, though, that feeling of calm and happiness washing over him when he was with Darren during that time will be mainly gone.


	3. Chapter 3

**If you want to see the masks I mention, I link them in the story at It-Could-Happen.**

* * *

Sitting in the chair next to Darren's desk the following Wednesday during lunch, Chris grades papers as Darren taps his pen on his desk.

"Are you okay, Chris?" Darren suddenly asks as he stops the tapping of his pen. "It's just...since I got in trouble for the whole lunch thing last week you've barely said two words in class; and to me."

"I'm fine." Chris looks up and forces a quick, small smile. Going back to grading papers, aimlessly marking wrong answers, he wants to get past it.

"It's okay to be mad at me."

Chris lets out a soft huff of breath. "I'm not mad. I just miss talking to you," he easily admits even though he kind of knows he shouldn't have said that.

"You can talk to me right now," Darren says. "No one has to be the wiser to what goes on during our Wednesday lunches together."

"You're okay with that?"

"It's just talking. We won't be doing anything wrong."

"Okay." Letting out a relieved breath, Chris suddenly feels much better than he did a few short minutes ago. "That's great."

"So," Darren chuckles as he finishes grading a paper, "what do you want to discuss?"

"Anything?"

"Anything," Darren repeats.

"Charles?" Chris says with a small smile.

"What?" Darren chuckles, confused at the name mention.

"The name of the guy you never told how you felt. Was it Charles?" Chris clears up. He hears Darren drop his head and sigh, shaking his head; but he also notices the corner of his mouth turn up into a smile. "You said anything."

"I did, didn't I?" Darren rhetorically asks. "And, no, it wasn't Charles."

"Matt or Matthew?"

"No."

"Franklin?" Chris starts grading a new paper.

"Like the cartoon turtle?" Darren asks with a small laugh.

"Yes," Chris nods his head, twirling his pen between his fingers, "like the turtle. I used to watch that when I was younger."

"I've seen some episodes," Darren admits; Chris arches an eyebrow at him in surprise. "I get bored. And that damn turtle is entertaining sometimes."

"Yeah, he is." Chris softly chuckles. "Catchy theme song."

"Very catchy."

"Hey, it's Franklin," Chris starts to sing.

"Please, don't sing that song," Darren begs. "It'll be stuck in my head all day."

"Coming over to play. Growing a little every day."

"Please."

"Okay," Chris laughs. "I'm stopping."

"Thank you. And, no," Darren tells him, "his name wasn't Franklin."

"I'll get it. Trust me."

"Well, while you do that go back to grading papers."

"Alright."

For a few minutes everything goes back to normal. Chris hears the sound of the clock ticking on the wall and Darren quietly humming when the first drop of blood falls and hits the paper on top of the stack in his lap. Seeing the blood hit the paper, he reaches up and presses his finger to his nose. Feeling warm liquid slowly starting to trickle out of his nose, he groans.

Setting the stack of papers on the desk, he stands up and tips his head back. "I'll be back in a second," he tells Darren as he starts to leave.

"Oh, shit! Are you okay?" Darren pushes his chair back and quickly stands up and walks over to Chris.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine." Chris can feel as blood starts to slide down the side of his cheek. "It's just the weather. It sometimes happens when the weather changes suddenly. It'll stop soon. And I heard that curse word."

"Come on, let's go to the bathroom. And it was said in a moment of complete surprise."

Surprised when Darren takes his hand, Chris smiles as he follows him to the restroom.

"Yeah, right. Surprise." Chris can feel as warm blood starts to slide down his hand and arm. "You're a shitty liar."

"I'm gonna pretend I just didn't hear that, if you didn't hear me," Darren says.

"Deal."

Going in and hearing the door close, he leans back against one of the sinks. Hearing Darren pull a few sheets of paper towels from the dispenser, Chris takes them when he comes back. Putting them to his nose, he drops his head and looks at Darren who stands close to him.

"Thanks," he graciously tells him. "You didn't have to come with me. I would have been fine on my own."

"I wanted to make sure you were okay. Shouldn't you sit down? You might get dizzy."

"I'm okay. I know I'll be fine." Chris notices Darren get a bit uneasy for a second. "What's wrong?" he asks as he pulls the soaked paper towel away and presses a clean one to his nose.

"I...I just have a small problem with blood," Darren admits. "I get squeamish and lightheaded, and sometimes sick."

"Are you serious?" Chris chuckles. "You're one of those people?"

"It's not funny," Darren tries to sternly say even though he starts to smile.

"Oh, my God!" Darren groans as the realization hits Chris. He can't hold back the laughter that falls from his lips. "That's why you knew you wouldn't be able to go into medicine?"

"Yes. And I told you it was embarrassing," Darren murmurs; Chris laughs again when he notices him go a bit uneasy when he looks at blood soaked paper towel.

"Good thing you didn't turn out to be that doctor," Chris teases.

"Good thing," Darren agrees.

"How about Andrew?" he asks to distract Darren.

Darren just laughs and shakes his head out of amusement.

Pulling the paper towel away when the bleeding stops, Chris cleans his face and tosses the soaked paper towels in the trash. "We should go back. It's stopped."

"Hold on."

Stopping before he can walk away, hearing the faucet turn on behind him, Chris sees as Darren brings a wet paper towel up to his face. Tensing some when Darren carefully wraps his fingers around his neck, he almost immediately relaxes when he realizes he's holding him and swipes the wet cloth over his cheek and along his neck.

"You have dried blood on your face," Darren softly tells him as he stares into his eyes.

"Th-Thanks." Heart hammering in his chest at having Darren so close, close enough to smell the scent of citrus that lingers on him, Chris wishes he could close what little space is between them and kiss Darren. Noticing Darren dart his eyes to his lips when he runs his tongue over the bottom one, he tries to convince himself Darren isn't thinking the same thing.

The sound of the bell ringing has Darren quickly pulling away from him. Upset when the touch of his hand is gone from his skin, Chris doesn't know what to say to just what happened.

"Um...Thanks for helping me," Darren says before Chris can say anything. It's the same thing he always tells him after their lunch together ends. "You should finish cleaning up. Just come get your stuff and I'll write you a pass."

"Okay." Standing there and watching Darren leave the restroom faster than a horse at a starting gate, Chris tries to calm his heart and even his breathing.

Turning to take a look at himself in the mirror, seeing his face is clean, he notices the blush staining his cheeks.

Looking down at his hands, he washes away the specks of blood on his skin. Cupping his hands under the running water, splashing his face to cool down, he tries his best not to think of Darren's hands on him; he tries not to think about what they could do to him.

Grabbing a paper towel and drying his face, Chris can't hold back the smile at the images those thoughts create.

Walking back into Darren's classroom and gathering his stuff, he avoids looking at him out of fear of blushing over what happened.

It was nothing big; just Darren gently touching him and being so close. But it seemed to tilt Chris' world in the best way imaginable.

"Here you go." Darren smiles as he holds out a slip of paper to him.

"Thanks." Chris takes the paper and finally looks up to Darren. Seeing a light in his eyes he's never seen before as he stares back at him, Chris starts to wonder how much has just changed for Darren.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Mr. Criss." Turning to walk out, getting out of the way of students coming into class, he steps out into the hallway. Taking several steps down the hall, he stops and turns at Darren calling his name. "Yeah?"

"No, it's not Andrew." Is all Darren says before smiling and turning around and walking back to his classroom.

Chris smiles and continues to head to his class, all his thoughts on Darren.

* * *

Walking up to Darren before class the next day, setting a paper bag down in front of him. "I made these for you." He pushes the bag forward. "You enjoyed them so much last time, I thought I'd make more for you."

Darren smiles as he takes the bag and starts to open it. "Let's see what we have here." Watching him take a look in the bag, Chris hears him softly moan. "You know, traditionally kids give apples to their teachers."

"Well, this kid bakes," Chris says with a small chuckle as he watches Darren reach in the bag and pull out a cookie. "And apples are boring."

"Compared to your cookies," Darren says around a mouthful of cookie, "they are extremely boring. Thanks for these, by the way. You didn't have to do that."

"I wanted to." Chris shrugs his shoulders like it was nothing. "And, Victor?"

"No," Darren replies with a laugh. "Not Victor."

Hearing the bell ring, and seeing students starting to walk into class, Chris smiles at Darren and walks back to his desk. Seeing Darren finish the cookie he was eating, Chris feels a bit of warmth bloom in his chest.

"Hey, Chris, you're drooling. In case you're wondering," Linden teases him as she sits at her desk.

"Shut up, Lin." Chris blushes and turns his gaze to Linden, who's biting her lower lip and grinning. "You do the same with Matthew."

"I do," Linden proudly admits like it's a great accomplishment.

"Alright, class," Darren says as he closes the paper bag of cookies and stands up. "Quiet down."

At the end of class, waiting for everybody to leave, Chris goes up to Darren, who is cleaning the dry-erase board. "Hey," he quietly says to get his attention.

"Hey, Chris." Darren grins as he turns to face him. "Do you need something?"

"Tucker?"

For a split-second, Chris sees confusion in Darren's eyes before it clicks. "No," he finally answers with a small smile as he shakes his head. "Go before you're late for your next class."

"Bye, Mr. Criss," Chris says as he walks away.

It's strange. But simply sitting and talking with Darren makes him happier. It makes it less painful after everything that happened in the last few weeks.

* * *

"...just don't understand why I have to come with you while you ogle Matthew? Can't you do it alone?" Chris hip checks his door, hearing it close, and shoves his keys in his pocket.

Walking over to Linden as she waits for him after climbing out of his car, he wraps an arm around her waist and holds her.

"I could do it alone," Linden goes about replying to Chris' question. "But this way it's less weird."

"Well, at least you acknowledge that it's weird."

"Oh, Mr. I'm-in-love-with-my-English-teacher," Linden teases. "Look at the pot calling the kettle black."

"Shut up, Kettle." Chris playfully pushes at Linden.

"Abuse," Linden jokingly accuses, flicking her finger on Chris' shoulder.

"Ow!" he complains as he rubs the spot she hit. "Why wou-Oh, my God, Lin! He's here."

"Who?" Linden looks around for who Chris is talking about and spots him. "Oh."

Darren sits in a corner looking completely lost in his work. Focused on the papers in front of him, with glasses perched on the bridge of his nose, Chris smiles at how cute he looks. "He's so cute," he whispers, voicing his thoughts, eyes never leaving Darren now that he's seen him.

"You should go talk to him," Linden tells him.

"Should I?" Chris questions, unsure if that's a smart idea.

"Yeah."

"I don't know." He starts to doubt going over. "Maybe he wants to be alone."

"Chris, I know you want to go over there," Linden says. "If I have to, I will drag you over there like you want."

"Fine!" he quietly exclaims, knowing full well Linden will follow through with her threat. "I'm going. I'm going." Looking over to Darren sitting at the booth intently focused on the papers in front of him, Chris feels his heart skip a beat at the mere sight of him. He also feels as nerves overtake him.

"You're still standing here," Linden says as she gently nudges him forward.

"Go stalk Matthew!" he playfully teases.

"Ouch!" Linden pretends to be hurt as she holds her hand over her heart and makes a shocked face. "From my best friend. I thought I knew you."

"What the hell do I say, Lin?"

"I think hi is a good place to start," she cheekily replies. "But, don't worry. You'll be fine. Oh, look, there's Matthew."

Looking to find Linden leaving him and walking up to the counter, Chris quietly laughs as she bravely walks up to where Matthew is. Deciding he should just go over, he walks over to where Darren currently sits. He's relieved when he never looks up from his papers, because he knows if he did he would just turn around and walk away.

"Hi," he tentatively says when he stops at the table Darren sits at.

Darren looks up at him, and a big smile spreads across his face. "Hey, Chris. Didn't expect to see any of my students tonight."

Chris lets the student comment fall to the wayside. "I wasn't planning on coming here," he replies. "But Linden begged me to come."

Darren must notice him shuffling his feet because he tells him, "You can sit down if you like." He moves some papers on the table in front of where Chris sits. "Why did she beg you?"

"She wants to lustfully stare at Matthew."

"Matthew?" Darren says a bit confused.

"Matthew Avery. You know, quarterback of the football team, Mr. Popular, cute, more than likely going to be Prom King." Chris notices Darren's smile falter the slightest when he mentions Matthew being cute. "Yeah, he works here."

"He does?"

"He flips burgers. Who do you think made your burger, Spongebob?" Chris chuckles, smiling when Darren laughs; he looks over to find Linden actually talking with Matthew. "Guess he's on his break."

"I shouldn't worry about any nose bleeds while you're here?"

"No." Chris takes a fry when Darren pushes his toward him in offering. "You're safe from fainting."

"I never said anything about fainting."

Smiling, Chris looks at all the papers currently sitting on the table in front of him. Seeing its assignments and whatnot that he's grading, he pulls a stack to him. "Want me to help you?" he asks.

"You don't have to."

"I don't mind." Chris takes one of the red pens sitting on the table.

"How have you been lately?" Darren asks as he takes a drink of his coke.

"It's easier. It still hurts, though." Putting aside the quiz he finished grading, he starts on a new one. "It's getting easier with each new day."

"That's good to hear."

Chris looks to Darren and smiles. "Did you have someone there for you like you are for me?"

"My boyfriend at the time. He was very supportive."

At the mention of an old boyfriend, Chris feels a pang of jealousy he shouldn't. He knows it's stupid to not like a guy he never knew. But he hates that he had a chance with Darren when he never will. "What was his name?" he decides to ask.

"Why do you need to know that?" Darren chuckles as he holds his pen between his two forefingers.

"Just wondering who was lucky enough to date you." It only takes a second for it to register with Chris what he said. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. It was inappropriate. That was wrong of me to say."

"It's fine," Darren assures him with a small laugh as he drops his pen to the tabletop. "And his name was Damien."

"Damien makes me think of that evil child from that movie," Chris mumbles. "What happened between you two? If you don't mind me asking."

"We just grew apart. By the time he was accepting a job offer in Chicago we had nothing left. We both knew it would be easier to end it than try to keep a dead relationship alive over long distance."

"So, you don't do long distance?"

"No." Darren shakes his head and picks up his pen again. "I'd rather just break-up than try that. It's more than likely going to end bad, anyways."

"Ever the optimistic," Chris teases. "But I get it." He minutely nods his head and shrugs his shoulders. "I was also wondering something else."

"What?"

"Ryan?"

"No," Darren answers without having to ask Chris to further explain.

"Drew?" he asks as they both go back to grading assignments.

"No."

"Justin?"

"No."

"Ethan?"

"Hey, Chris," Linden says when she comes up to the table smiling wide. "Hey, Mr. Criss. Who's Ethan?"

"Hello, Linden," Darren replies.

"It's nobody. It's nothing, Lin," Chris tells her.

"Alright. You ready to go?" Linden asks him.

"Yeah." Capping the pen and standing up, Chris looks to Darren as he stares up at him. "Bye, Da-...Mr. Criss."

"Bye, Chris," Darren says as he smiles and waves. "See you guys Monday."

"Alright."

Climbing back into his car a few moments later, Linden sitting in the passenger seat, Chris can't fight the big, goofy smile on his face.

"You look like you just discovered masturbation, and how awesome it is."

"Oh, my God, Lin!" Chris exclaims as he drops his head to the steering wheel, a fresh wave of embarrassment hitting him. "I can't believe you just said that."

"What?" Linden says innocently. "You just look like you didn't realize how amazing a little touch of your hand can be."

"Are you seriously comparing Darren, our English teacher, to masturbation at the moment?"

"And if I am?" Linden cheekily replies, smirking. "I'm not the one all flushed and looking worked over."

"I'm not flushed." Chris hastily pulls down his visor, looking into the mirror, and instantly sees the red staining his cheeks. "Oh, God! I'm flushed. What if he saw?! What if he knows I still have feelings for him?!" Chris starts to panic and drops his head in his hands. Just when Darren and he were starting to be on good terms again.

"Chris! Chris!" Linden reaches over and pulls his hands away, making him look at her. "It's okay."

"No, it's not. I'm still in love with him, and I'm positive he knows."

"And what's wrong with that?"

"It's embarrassing," Chris mumbles.

"No, it's not."

"How so?"

"You didn't see what I saw," Linden replies.

"What did you see?"

"He was flushed too."

* * *

Chris tries not to think about what Linden told him. He considers maybe she was just seeing things; maybe it was nothing. Maybe he shouldn't be thinking too much into it when it could mean nothing. That's what he tries to do. But sitting so close to him on Wednesday, it's all he can think about.

It's all that's on his mind. He tries to focus on what Darren gave him to grade, but he keeps looking at Darren through the corner of his eyes and drifting off. He starts to get wild ideas of maybe Darren feeling something for him in return. He gets so distracted by it all, he doesn't hear what Darren asks him.

"I'm sorry. What?" he mumbles.

"I asked if you are going to the dance Friday?" Darren asks him as he sits at his usual spot and arranges papers by class, catching him staring.

"God, no," Chris replies, a bit embarrassed at being caught staring. "But Linden keeps trying to talk me into it. Too bad her efforts are fruitless."

"How did you two become friends? If you don't mind me asking." Darren leans back in his chair, twiddling his pen between his fingers. "I just don't understand..."

"How someone like her and someone like me could be friends?" Chris finishes for him, seeing Darren's eyes instantly fill with regret.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that." Darren continues to profusely apologize after that.

"It's okay." Chris laughs at his unease. "It was in third grade. We were all outside for recess. I was on a swing minding my own business, because, even then, I knew I was different. Anyways, John came up to me and-"

"Wait. John who?" Darren asks.

"Oh, John Coleman, he's in the class I have with you," Chris clarifies for him.

"Oh. Okay."

"Anyways, he came up and started mocking and making fun of me. He was poking me and saying rude things. I guess Linden heard and came over. And without a seconds thought she punched him."

"Wait!" Darren says in shock. "Linden punched John Coleman? She's tiny compared to him."

"She was then, too. It didn't stop him from toppling to the ground and crying like a little baby." Chris laughs as he recalls that memory. "We became inseparable after that. Ended up getting in trouble together after that. A teacher saw what happened."

"Why'd you get in trouble, too? The teacher must have seen Linden punch him?"

"She did. But Linden told me to kick him for being mean to me. Said he deserved it. I did, and it felt great. She took my hand and we walked away. We've kind of had each other's backs after that."

"So, now she's trying to talk you into going to the dance with her?" Darren chuckles.

"Yeah." Chris nods his head. "She keeps telling me about the outfit she has, and how she has the perfect mask to go along with occasion. She says she has one for me, too. But that's not for me."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure."

"What are you going to do, then?"

"Stay home and eat the Halloween candy that my mom bought for me to pass out," Chris says. "And then pass out in front of the television watching that Charlie Brown movie my sister loves that they always show this time of year."

Darren chuckles. "That sounds…"

"Boring?" Chris finishes for him, laughing.

"Fun. I was going to say fun," Darren says.

"Oh. Well, of course it's going to be fun. It's me," Chris jokes.

"Don't have too much fun. Don't want you to accidentally go into a sugar coma," Darren tells him.

"I'll try not," Chris laughs, blushing the slightest as Darren smiles at him.

* * *

"I don't understand why you are dragging me to this excuse for a social gathering." Chris looks at himself in the rear view mirror as he slips his eye mask on. The laser cut metal is cold against his skin, but rest perfectly on his face. The black mask is designed to look like a bat, and if Chris is being honest, it's totally cool.

"Because it'll be fun," Linden counter-replies, slipping on her mask.

Going to the school's annual Halloween masquerade dance was something he was against. He'd rather be at home marathoning Halloweentown than be here. But Linden kept going on and on about how it was the last one they could attend. That they should be social for several hours even though they didn't much care for any of their fellow classmates. Besides each other, of course.

She, finally, somehow, managed to talk him into it. It was a stupid dance that they could leave whenever they wanted to. He holds onto the hope that they only end up staying a maximum of two hours.

"Besides," Linden says, smiling at him. Her purple, laser-cut, metal mask resting perfectly on her face. It goes perfectly with her black strapless dress that stops right above her knees. Chris' favorite part of her outfit being her black Converse. She told him that she was going to be pretty...to an extent. "What else are we gonna do? Watch movies and binge eat candy all night? This is more fun."

"Whatever you say, Lin." Chris reaches up and adjusts his mask so it's perfect. Climbing out of the car, he walks over to the passenger side. Holding out his arm for Linden, he asks in a voice as cheery as it'll get tonight, "Ready for the dance, m'lady?"

Linden chuckles as she loops her arm through Chris'. "Why, good sir!" she replies in due fashion, sounding like a southern belle, and fluttering her eyelashes at him for added flair and dramatic effect. "However could I refuse?"

"God, Linden," Chris laughs as they head for the school. "We need more friends."

"I'm perfectly fine with just you as my friend," Linden replies, squeezing his arm. "You entertain me enough."

"I can say the same." Grabbing the door handle and pulling it open, stepping out of the way so Linden can walk inside, he follows in suit.

Once reaching the gym where the dance is being held, hearing music playing, Chris pushes open the door and lets Linden walk in, following after her. Seeing Halloween decorations everywhere, tables set up, kids and teachers all around dressed up and wearing masks, Chris wants to instantly leave.

"Can I bail?" he sarcastically asks, but being half serious.

"No, you can't." Chris notices Linden looking around, almost as if searching for someone. "Who you looking for?" he teases, playfully nudging her.

"What? Oh...No one." Linden shakes her head and smiles. "Just seeing who's here."

"More like seeking out," Chris points out with a small laugh.

"Am not. I-" Linden stops talking when a guy wearing a red mask starts to walk towards them. Chris notices her smile real big and fix her hair, but when he walks past, he notices her slump and drop her smile.

Seeing that, Chris starts to question why they are really here. Thinking about it now, Linden's reason for this being their last chance to attend this doesn't seem like the whole reason they are currently here. "Lin, why are we here?" he seriously asks, voice filled with wonder.

"I...I'm meeting someone," she nervously replies, chewing her lower lip.

"What?! Someone other than me?" Chris pretends to be offended and hurt, winking at Linden. "Who is it?"

"I don't know." Linden shrugs her shoulders.

"What do you mean you don't know?"

"It's...It's a secret admirer."

"Lin!" Chris exclaims, actually shocked by her answer.

"I know. I know." Linden nods her head, saying she knows he thinks she's crazy for this. "He told me to meet him here. Said he'd be wearing a red eye mask."

"Lin, there's lots of guys wearing red masks," Chris points out, deciding not to bother her about doing this. And forcing him to come here. "How do you know this guy is real?"

"I don't." Linden sighs, dropping her shoulders and looking defeated. "I'm stupid. Am I stupid? I can't believe I was so gullible. We should go."

"It's okay, Lin. It'll be fi-" Looking over Linden's head, he sees him walking towards them. Even with the red eye mask resting on his face, Chris knows who it is. "You're gonna give me all the details."

"What?!" Linden says, sounding confused.

"Have fun." Grabbing her by her shoulders, Chris turns her around.

Even with the music, he hears the gasp she releases. Smiling for his best friend, he lets her go as she takes the hand Matthew offers her.

Watching her walk away, chuckling when she looks back at him with shock still on her face, Chris stands there alone. Feeling awkward, he looks at all the people and considers just leaving.

"Hey, Chris," Darren's voice suddenly says. Chris looks to find him walking up and stopping in front of him; he wears a intricately designed laser cut black mask the rests perfectly over his eyes. "What are you doing here?"

Chris is surprised by seeing Darren. When he asked him if he was coming to the dance, he never even entertained the thought about the idea of Darren being a chaperon. But he likes seeing him. It makes a happiness swim through him.

"I forgot a book in my locker I needed," Chris deadpans, turning the corner of his mouth into a small smile.

"Funny." Darren laughs as he sets his drink he holds on one of the many Halloween decorated tables. "But, I thought you weren't coming? You told me-"

"Linden finally talked me into it," Chris cuts him off. "Trust me, I'd rather be someplace else at the moment."

"Where is Linden?" Darren takes a quick look around the semi-darkened room.

"With Matthew Avery dancing," Chris tells him. "Turns out he was her secret admirer."

"Huh. A secret admirer. That's good for her." Chris sees as Darren looks out to the dance floor.

Looking himself, he spots Linden joyfully laughing and smiling as she dances with Matthew. "Yeah," he softly sighs. "Seems everybody has somebody to dance with tonight. I'm the black sheep."

"Don't worry," Darren softly says. "You'll find someone to dance with one day."

"Why don't you dance with me?" Chris jokingly asks, although he is half-serious, nodding his head to the crowd of couples slow dancing at the moment.

"You know I can't," Darren softly replies, sounding broken up about it, as he takes a small step back; Chris feels a pain at hearing his reply. "Why did you even ask me that?"

"Because I want to dance with you," Chris replies in honest, small smile playing at the corner of his mouth. "Please?"

Seeing his hand twitch at his side, Chris watches as Darren slowly reaches out and takes his hand in his. The fear of being seen is not felt; he knows no one can see them in the darkened room.

An electric spark shoots up his arm at Darren's touch. It seems to jolt his heart and waken him up to what's just in front of him. Everything else around Darren and he is gone. It's only green eyes and a face being half-hidden by a mask.

"This is wrong, Chris," Darren quietly whispers as he strokes his thumb over the back of Chris' knuckles, making it harder for him to breathe at the touch.

"This could be right," he whispers back as he softly brushes his fingers over Darren's hand. It's so innocent, but so sensual at the same time. It almost feels like walking a mine field and not knowing what each new step could bring. "Please tell me I'm not the only one that feels it."

That seems to snap Darren out of the daze he is in because Chris immediately feels him pull his hand away and ball into a tight fist at his side. "No."

"No, what?"

"No, I won't dance with you. No, I don't feel it too," Darren clarifies for Chris as he takes a step back, putting as much space between Chris and he. "This needs to stop. I'm your teacher, Chris."

"You're right. You were right," Chris mutters, voice broken, as he glances at the door, already getting ready to flee. He fights to hold back the tears that spring to his eyes. This is more pain he could have avoided; pain to go with everything else that's happened these past several weeks. "I'm being stupid, and a complete idiot. I don't know what I was thinking, again."

Turning and quickly heading for the door, feeling like an asshole for leaving Linden to her own devices, he pushes at the handle and walks out. Hearing the door shut with a heavy thud, seeing the hallways empty, he starts to head for the exit. Picking up the pace at which he walks, trying to forget everything that just happened, he sees the door to leave when he turns a corner.

He makes it exactly two steps down the hall before someone takes ahold of his wrist. Looking to find Darren holding his wrist and dragging him to a nearby empty classroom, he willingly goes.

Stepping inside, realizing its Mrs. Hamilton's class, he hears the door softly shut behind him. Turning to face Darren, ready to ask what this is all about, the words die in his throat when Darren suddenly pulls him close and kisses him.

It takes a few seconds for it to register for Chris what is happening. But when it does, he melts into Darren's touch.

Closing his eyes and kissing back, noticing how perfect Darren's mouth fits to his, he lets himself get lost in the moment. The press of full, soft lips to his is everything he's wanted for so long. The way Darren splays his hand at his lower back and pulls him closer makes him shiver in a way he never imagined. He'd dreamed of this happening thousands of times, but being here now it's so much better than anything he's ever dreamed.

Softly sighing when he parts his lips and feels Darren tentatively licking into his mouth, a thrill runs through him at the slide of their tongues together.

Breathing when Darren pulls away, a bit dizzy and lightheaded with delight, Chris can't hold back the smile on his lips. "Wh-...Why did you kiss me?" he asks perplexed.

"I lied," Darren replies as he holds Chris' face in his hands.

"About what?" Chris stares at Darren's eyes that are being illuminated from the light of the moon spilling into the classroom windows.

"I feel it too. I've felt it for some time," Darren explains.

"Why say what you did, then?"

"I'm a twenty-eight year old teacher, and you're my seventeen year old student, Chris. I shouldn't be acting on these feelings I have for you."

"But you just did," Chris points out.

"And I want to do it again." Darren caresses Chris' warm cheek with his thumb.

"Then do," Chris whispers, surprised he can form words at the moment.

Going when Darren lifts him up onto the desk, standing between his parted thighs, Chris drapes his arms over Darren's shoulders and releases a small, throaty moan when they start kissing again.

"Chris," Darren says as if answering a question he didn't ask.

"What?" he says confused.

Darren grins at him. "You said you wanted to know the name of the guy I never told how I felt."

Thinking it over, Chris lets out a small laugh. Leaning forward, he takes Darren's mouth in another kiss.

"Chris!"

The sound of Linden calling his name has him snapping out of the haze of delight he is in. Hopping of the desk, letting out a small laugh as he fixes his clothes and mask, he walks out of the room.

"Yeah?" he says a bit out of breath. He can feel his heart hammering in his chest.

"Hey! Where were you?" Linden asks as she walks over to him.

"Just getting some alone time," Chris replies. "Why are you yelling my name like some crazy woman?"

"Shut up." Linden laughs and playfully shoves him. "I just wanted to tell you that Matthew is taking me home."

"Okay." Chris smiles at her. "Have fun." He wiggles his eyebrows and suggestively whistles.

"Stop!" Linden blushes, covering her big grin with her hand. "I'm not gonna do anything. He's just driving me home."

"Tell me if he's a good kisser."

"Oh, my God! Bye, Chris." Linden turns and walks away.

"Bye," he yells to her.

Going back into the room after Linden walks away, thinking for a split second Darren has freaked out over what happened, he moans when soft, full lips are back on his once again. Wrapping his arms around Darren's neck, he kisses back with vigor.

"W-Why now?" Chris asks as he pulls away to breathe.

Darren chuckles. "I was planning on waiting until you graduated," he admits. "But I kept noticing how sad you were, and how some of that was my fault. I couldn't stand to see you like that anymore."

"So, you kissed me out of pity? Nice."

"No. I kissed you because I've wanted to for months. Because I knew I could make you happy." Chris turns into Darren's touch when he softly strokes his thumb over his cheek, looking up at him with bright eyes filled with joy. "See," Darren says with a grin, "that's the look I wanted to see."

Softly moaning when Darren leans in and kisses him again, Chris feels a flutter in his chest. He still can't believe this is happening; that Darren is doing this. Then he starts to wonder if it's just this one kiss, or if this is the start of something more.

"Are...Are we really doing this?" Chris asks between kisses. He refers to much more than the kiss they are sharing.

Are they together? Are they willing to break the rules to be together? Is this a secret that they will have to guard with their lives?

"Yes," Darren replies as if answering all the questions Chris was asking in that one.

Following Darren when he starts to walk backward, he lets out a small scream when Darren suddenly sits down in a chair, taking him with him without saying anything. Sitting in Darren's lap, he attaches his mouth to Darren's and goes back to kissing him.

Thirty minutes later, pulling off his mask, sitting in his car and driving away from the school, Chris can't stop grinning. Kissing Darren is most definitely the highlight of this night. He wishes he could tell Linden, but he knows he can't. For Darren and his safety.

As he drives home, he knows he won't be able to sit in Mrs. Hamilton's class without thinking about what he did tonight.


	4. Chapter 4

It's the first time...ever he looks forward to going to school on a Monday. And it all has to do with seeing Darren again. He hasn't talked to him since the classroom make out during the dance, but he figures it's nothing when they had no way of knowing the other's number.

Arriving to class ten minutes before the bell rings, leaving Linden with Matthew as they act all sickeningly cute, he steps into the room to find Darren writing on the dry-erase board. Glad no one else is in the room; he sits at his desk and stares at Darren's ass in the jeans he wears.

"Is the term "Hot for teacher" too inappropriate to use right now?" Chris speaks up, noticing Darren still for a second at the sound of his voice. "Because I definitely am at the moment."

"Good morning, Chris," Darren says in a normal voice as he continues to write on the board. "Have you completed your homework I assigned Friday? Because, if not, you have some time before class starts."

Chris gets confused at what Darren tells him. He doesn't get why he's acting like nothing happened just a few short days before. "Yeah," he answers as he nods his head.

"Good," Darren says as he turns to face him, fixing a stack of papers on his desk.

"Darren?" Chris whispers.

"Yes, Chris?" Darren says in a tone of voice that sounds more like a teacher than the guy who was kissing him Friday night.

"Nothing," Chris mumbles, resting his head on his desk.

He ignores it for the rest of class. He ignores Darren as he teaches; he can't look at him without feeling a bit upset. He knows if he gives it any thought, he will only think things that will upset and confuse him. So, it's best to let it go for now.

Talking to Linden as Darren goes on about the meanings in The Scarlett Letter, giggling over something she tells him, he reaches over and playfully pushes at her shoulder.

"Chris!" Darren calls his name, getting his attention. "Since I seem to be of a bore to you, you can make up today's lesson in detention."

Hearing some students let out little snickers, and others look at him with amusement in their eyes, he glares back at them. At the moment, he's pissed at Darren. Why should he be the only one to get in trouble? Don't get him wrong, he doesn't want Linden in trouble along with him. But it's not fair.

The sound of the bell ringing ten minutes later, signaling the end of class, Chris stands up and grabs his stuff. Heading out of the room, he stops and walks back to Darren. "Why didn't you give Linden detention, as well?" He stops in front of Darren's desk, hand wrapped around the one strap of his backpack strung over his shoulder. "She was talking as just as much as me. It's not fair." He states his thoughts.

He watches as Darren sees the last student leave, knowing his second period is his free one. "I know," Darren says as he rearranges papers on his desk.

"Is this because of what happened at the dance? Are you going to unfairly start punishing me for it? Because, I ne-"

"You want to know why I gave you detention and not Linden, too?"

"Yes." Chris nods his head.

"Because she's not the one I've been thinking of kissing for almost two days," Darren nonchalantly says, grinning at him. "I needed an excuse to see you. And you gave it to me."

Chris' cheeks warm as he blushes, biting his lower lip to hold back the beaming smile he feels playing at his lips. "O-Okay," he mumbles.

"By the way, I'm sorry about how I acted earlier. But you have to know I can't act like more than your teacher while in school."

"I'm sorry, then, for ignoring you in class. I was mad about how you treated me. I didn't understand," Chris admits, feeling stupid for not getting it sooner. Of course Darren has to be cautious; they both have to be. And there he was saying things that could have been heard by others.

"It's okay. Go to class, Chris," Darren chuckles. "I'll see you later."

"Bye, Dare," Chris whispers so no one can hear. Turning on his heel, he walks out of the room. Thinking about the next few hours, he knows it will be torture until the final bell of the day rings and he can see Darren.

When the bell does ring, standing up and fighting from practically sprinting to Darren's room, he places the strap of his bag on his shoulder and walks to his locker. Placing his books in there and shutting it, he smiles at Linden as she walks up to him.

"Hey," he says as he leans back against the row of lockers. "I know why I'm still here. Why are you still here?"

"I'm waiting for Matthew. We're going to go grab a bite to eat together."

"So, you and Matthew? Tell me: is he a good kisser?" Chris teases her, seeing her blush. He knows if Linden knew the truth, he'd be getting teased about Darren just as much.

"He's a great kisser," Linden replies.

Looking at the time, Chris knows he should be heading to Darren's classroom. "I gotta go. Got boring detention to sit through." Chris can't help but to think how detention will be anything but boring.

"Sorry I got you into trouble. I didn't mean to," Linden apologizes.

"It's fine." Pushing off the lockers, and leaning over to give Linden a quick kiss on her cheek, Chris spots Matthew behind her heading their way. "Your guy is coming this way. Have fun."

"I'll see you later. Bye."

"Bye." Walking away, Chris feels excitement and anticipation build in him with every step he gets closer to being alone with Darren.

Stepping into the room, finding it empty, he goes to sit down. Sitting in one of the desk in the front row, waiting for Darren to come, Chris can't believe Darren practically had it arranged so they could meet to make out. Sneaking around behinds people's backs, meeting in an empty classroom when they shouldn't, and simply being together, is all thrilling and exciting for him.

Sitting up and grinning when he sees Darren walk into the room, he starts to move to get up to go over to him.

"Wait." Darren holds up his hand to stop him from getting up. "Not yet."

Confused as to why he is making them wait, Chris settles back down in his seat. It's two minutes later that Ms. DuBois walks into the classroom. Tight, black pencil skirt and red button-up shirt, the first two buttons undone enough to show off more skin than is necessary, and black high-heels accentuate her small frame. Her red hair up in a perfect bun, and green eyes striking behind the lenses of her glasses.

All Chris really knows about her is that she moved here from Louisiana. Her accent is very discernible when she talks. Thick with a southern drawl, mixed with a bit of Creole French, he easily gets why all the guys fawn over her. Combined with the voice and body, she is also one hell of a looker.

"Hey, Brooke." Darren walks over and stops right in front of her.

"Darren. What do you say to you and me and drinks right now?" Chris bites his lower lip from laughing when he notices Brooke stick out her chest a bit more.

"Sorry, can't." Darren points to him and explains he has detention, Brooke turns her attention on him, and Chris notices her registered surprise at seeing him there.

"Maybe next time." Brooke slowly runs her hand down the length of Darren's arm, not being shy about the fact that she's intentionally doing it to touch him. But Chris can see that Darren doesn't realize that; he is totally unaware of what's going on. "I should go then," Brooke says with a smile. "Margarita Mondays is calling my name."

"You have class tomorrow," Darren reminds her.

"I know." She grins and walks away, but not before giving Darren a wink.

Chris quietly laughs as an oblivious Darren simply smiles and waves goodbye to her before turning and going over to his desk, sitting down in his chair. Standing up and sauntering over to Darren as he sits in his chair and watches him, he steps in front of him and pushes himself up onto the desk. "You do realize she's in to you," he states as scoots back a bit more. Legs dangling over the side, running his shoe along Darren's leg, he grins at him.

"She doesn't seem to grasp the meaning of no." Darren stands up and looms a few inches over Chris.

Chris tilts his head back some to stare up at him. "Just tell her you're gay. She'll back off after that." He knows that Darren hasn't told any of the other staff members of his sexual orientation. Out of fear or being alienated, he's not entirely sure. But, whatever the reason, he's not forcing him to sing it from the top of a cafeteria table. It's Darren's choice, not his.

"I'd rather not tell my coworkers that. If having to deal with being hit on as my only problem, I'm fine with that."

"Alright." Chris longingly gazes up at him with want unfurling in his belly. "Can we make out now?"

"Yes. But let me close the door first," Darren replies as he stands up. "Just to be safe."

Watching Darren quickly stride across the room and close the door, hearing it be locked as well, Chris stays where he's seated on the desk and eyes Darren as he walks back to him. Opening his legs the slightest so Darren can stand between them, tipping his head back to gaze up at him, he feels heat and anticipation at having Darren's mouth on his own. Fluttering his eyes closed when Darren leans down to him and places a kiss to the corner of his mouth, Chris turns his head the slightest and takes Darren's mouth in the much needed and wanted kiss.

After waiting what felt like forever to kiss him, and never even knowing if it would happen, Chris takes from Darren what he's wanted for so long. Now having him here kissing him like it's the last thing either of them will get to do, making him moan as he thrusts his tongue into his mouth, he knows right then and there he'll never get enough of this.

Feeling Darren's hand wrap around his neck, thumb resting right over his racing pulse point, knowing he feels it, Chris feels as he winds his arm around his waist and pulls him closer to his body. Opening his legs more so he can have Darren as close as possible to him, lifting them to hook over his Darren's hips, he lets a small moan pass his lips at how amazing and perfect this is. After wanting it for so long, finally having it is better than any daydream he ever had.

"I should get detention more often," he pants against Darren's lips.

"No. We're never doing this again."

Those words make Chris still with fear and worry. His mind immediately goes to the worst possible scenarios. He starts to think that Darren changed his mind and realized this was a mistake, or that he never really wanted this to begin with. Planting his hands on his chest and pushing him away, trying to hide the hurt from his eyes, he hops off the desk. "I have to go," he mumbles as he walks to grab his bag.

Placing the strap across his chest, he heads for the door. Pulling it open, he immediately has it shut by the two hands on either side of him. Turning around, he faces a confused Darren.

"Why are you leaving?" Darren asks with confusion lacing his voice.

"Why should it matter to you, Mr. Criss?" Chris knows it's low of him to once again refer to Darren as his teacher considering he just had his tongue in his mouth.

"Don't call me that," Darren tells him.

"Why? It's your title; you're my teacher. It's all you'll be to me once I leave this room." Grabbing the strap of his bag with both his hands, he clutches it tight enough for his knuckles to turn white.

"What makes you think that?"

"You just said: We're never doing this again." Chris doesn't mean to raise his voice, but he does. He gets mad at Darren. "That's why I think that."

Staring at him while mad, brows furrowed in anger, Chris least expects Darren to lunge forward and hungrily kiss him. He tries to resist for 0.01 seconds. But he easily gives in. Backing up against the door, moaning when Darren easily lifts him up; wrapping his legs around his waist, Chris doesn't even care anymore that he should be mad at Darren.

"Chris," Darren mumbles against his lips.

"Yes?" Chris murmurs, lost in a dizzy of happiness and lust.

"I meant we're never doing this again here. It's too risky," Darren clarifies with a grin. "I couldn't never not do this again with you if I tried."

Chris blushes in embarrassment and relief. Kissing Darren again slow and languid, his heart races at knowing this won't be the last time he gets to experience this.

* * *

"How was detention?" Linden asks as she comes up beside him.

"Boring. Just like I said it would be," Chris lies to her, shutting his locker.

"Oh, come on, Chris. You spent an hour alone in a room with the guy you have feelings for. It had to be far from boring." Linden looks at him as she raises an eyebrow, giving him a look that says she knows she's right.

"Okay," Chris huffs, deciding to give her the clean version of what happened the day before. "I really loved being able to look at him." _More like stick my tongue down his throat_, he thinks. "We talked." _We kissed until all I could taste was the cinnamon flavor on his tongue from his gum for hours after._ "I didn't do anything beyond sitting there and work on some assignments." _I really learned how amazing of a kisser Darren is._

"That, actually, sounds boring," Linden comments, looking unsatisfied with Chris' reply. "It must have sucked."

"Yeah, it sucked." Chris fights his grin as he recalls how Darren gently sucked on his lower lip in a way that had sparks of desire shooting up his spine.

"Do you think maybe he's with someone? He could have a girlfriend or boyfriend." Linden questions with curiosity.

"_'Girlfriend?'_" Chris snorts, sounding amused at Linden's choice of words.

"What? You never told me if he was gay. You seemed so sure, like you knew something I didn't."

"Even though I shouldn't tell you because I promised him, he's gay," Chris clarifies for her. "So, no girlfriend of that kind to speak of."

"Boyfriend?"

"I think so." Chris says it more as a way to get Linden to stop pushing for answers to questions he can't give. He also doesn't ignore how he kind of just referred to himself as Darren's boyfriend, and that has him giddy inside. He wants to ask Darren about that, but he knows that's for another time when they're not in school.

"Sorry," Linden says in a comforting voice. "I really thought you had a chance with him."

"It's fine. I'm happy right now." Of course he can't say that he's happy because of Darren. "Come on, we have to get to class."

* * *

Just like the previous Wednesdays before, Chris finds himself sitting next to Darren's desk during lunch. A stack of tests that he's helping to grade sit in his lap. But grading is proving to be difficult when he keeps glancing to Darren's mouth.

Thinking about soft, full, pink lips pressed to his makes him want to toss the papers away and climb into Darren's lap and kiss him until they are both gasping for air.

"Stop thinking about kissing me and grade those papers." Darren grins and looks at him with a look that says he knows exactly what he's thinking.

"I can't help it. You have very tempting lips I want to kiss." Uncapping the red pen he holds, Chris looks at the first of many tests in his lap.

Quickly marking through several of them, coming to the conclusion that some people in his class are as stupid as they look, he stops when he gets to his test. "Do I just give myself an A, or do I go ahead and grade?" he jokes as he holds up the paper with his name scrawled in the left hand corner.

"Give me that." Darren laughs and takes the paper from him.

Seeing him start to grade it, Chris goes back to grading the ones he has. He chuckles when he gets to Linden's test, not surprised she gets a perfect score.

"Here." Darren holds out the test to him. "A perfect score."

"Told you." Chris playfully sticks his tongue out and takes the paper from Darren's fingers. Looking at what is written in the corner, he covers his face with the paper and blushes. He can't believe Darren. Of course he would ask him in some crazy way.

Lowering the paper some so his eyes are uncovered, he looks to Darren to find him staring at him with a gleam in his eyes, and with a bright, hopeful smile on his face.

"So, what do you say? Will you go out with me on Saturday?" Darren asks. "Well, not…out. More like come over to my house for a date."

All Chris can do is enthusiastically nod his head.

* * *

"Hey, Lin," Chris greets her as he presses the phone to his ear. Rummaging through his closet, he debates over what to wear for his date in less than an hour and a half. "Why you calling?"

"What? I can't call my best friend?" Linden feigns being upset, but letting out a laugh anyways. "No. I was wondering if you wanted to catch a movie tonight with me? We can go see something totally cliché and boring while we eat junk food."

Chris internally panics. What does he say: Sorry, I can't because I have a date with our English teacher I can't stop thinking about kissing. He knows he most definitely can not say that. Thinking about it, he tries to come up with the most believable lie to tell. Then he decides it's just easiest to decline.

"Not tonight, Lin," he says as he grabs jeans that he knows he looks great in. "I just wanna stay home and catch up on some work. Besides, call Matthew and go out with him."

"No can do," Linden tells him. "He's working tonight."

"Then go see him and hang around the place for a few hours. It's not like you haven't done it before."

"Low, Colfer. Low," Linden teases. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow or Monday then."

"Yeah."

"Bye, Chris."

"Bye, Lin."

Ending the call and finishing getting ready, he takes one final look at himself in the mirror. Liking how he looks, he heads downstairs. Finding his mom in the kitchen cooking, he goes up to her. "Bye, mom," he says as he gives her a kiss on her cheek. "I'll be back later."

"Where you going?"

"Just out for a few hours."

"Alright," his mom says as she hugs him. "Be careful."

"I will be," he tells her.

Letting go and walking away, he stops when he sees Hannah. "Bye, Hannah." Chris smiles as she barely makes an effort to say bye back, too into the show she is currently watching.

Pulling into Darren's garage thirty minutes later, seeing him standing at the door, hearing the garage door shut behind him, Chris climbs out of the car and walks over to him.

Closing the space between them and pressing close to Darren, immediately kissing him, he smiles when he's lifted an inch off the ground.

"I'm so glad to see you," Darren mumbles against his lips.

Chris lets out a small giggle as he wraps his arms around Darren's neck. "You saw me yesterday," he points out when he pulls back.

"I did. That's true." Darren laughs. "But I didn't get to do this."

Chris softly moans when Darren kisses him again. Smiling against Darren's lips when he lets up, he looks into gorgeous hazel eyes filled with happiness. "I like getting to do that with you."

"I can't stop thinking about doing that with you," Darren admits with a small laugh. "Kind of distracting when I'm trying to teach."

"That's nice to hear," Chris laughs against Darren's lips. "Although, you hid your desire to kiss me very well."

"I just kept thinking about tonight, and that got me through it."

"Well, now we're here. What do you want to do? And just so you know, I am totally up for making out for the entire time."

Darren just chuckles and shakes his head. "I ordered Chinese because I can't cook to save my life. So, are you hungry?"

"Starving," Chris answers.

Slipping his hand in Darren's, he follows him inside the house. Getting a look around the nice, spacious house, Chris finds it crazy that he's here. He never thought he'd get to this moment; being in Darren's home is something he thought would never happen a few months ago. It's surreal; it all feels like a dream, and one he doesn't want to wake from if it's not real.

Stopping in the living room, taking a look around, he gazes to Darren and smiles. "Nice house," he comments.

"Thanks," Darren replies. "But I'm renting. God knows I wouldn't be able to afford this on my salary."

Feeling Darren give his hand a squeeze, he turns into him and places a sweet, affectionate kiss on his lips. An arm wrapping around his waist and pulling him closer has him sighing. Staring into Darren's eyes when he pulls back, Chris is surprised when he takes their clasped hands and rests them to his chest and starts to slowly sway. "What are you doing?" he quietly asks.

"I'm giving you the dance you asked for last week," Darren responds as he sways to music that isn't playing.

Smiling, Chris wraps his other arm around Darren's neck. Resting his cheek against Darren's, he closes his eyes and moves with Darren. Slowly dancing in Darren's living room, hearing him softly humming by his ear, already knowing this is one of the best nights of his life so far, Chris can't stop his heart from wildly beating in his chest.

Turning his head and nuzzling his nose along Darren's cheek, feeling lite stubble against his chin and lips. Moaning when Darren turns and captures his mouth in a tender kiss, still swaying together, he parts his lips and lets Darren tentatively dip his tongue into his mouth. Softly whimpering when he massages his tongue with Darren's, lost in all that is happening, Chris doesn't realize he's being walked backward to the couch. Feeling the back of his legs hit the couch, he lies down as Darren continues to kiss him. Getting comfortable and parting his thighs, he gasps when Darren lowers himself down on him, brushing their clothed erections together. Hooking his legs over Darren's hips, he softly moans into Darren's mouth when he gently starts to rock his hips down.

When he came over tonight, Chris was not expecting anything of this magnitude to happen. The most he expected was some heavy making out. But now that he's here, experiencing Darren moving on top of him in a way that makes him softly moan, he wants nothing else but this. This is better than anything he thought would happen tonight.

It's a rush of emotions and thoughts and feelings as Darren and he slowly move together. But it's all focused on Darren. It's the most he felt connected to someone. He feels as if he's rooted to this one spot by this one person. He knows he's supposed to be here with Darren; it feels right.

"Are you okay?" Darren softly pants against Chris' lips, reaching down and gripping at his thigh.

"Y-Yeah." Chris nods his head, keeping his eyes on Darren's, clutching at his back.

"Does it feel good?" Darren thrust his hips down hard, gently grinding them against Chris, making him tip his head back and whimper.

Chris digs his short nails into Darren's back, slowly losing all coherent thoughts; solely focused on the white, hot pleasure starting to swim through his veins. But he somehow manages to reply with a yes and nod his head.

Moaning when Darren kisses him slow and languid, gently thrusting his tongue into his mouth as he continues to slowly rock against him, Chris feels as his orgasm starts to build in his belly. Heat swirls and spreads under his skin. Lifting his hips up into Darren, moving with him, pleasure flowing through him with each brush of their groins, getting closer and closer, he chases his release. "I...I'm close, Dare," he heavily breathes. Turning his head and exposing more of his neck when Darren starts to kiss at the soft skin, he moans as each small kiss and nip of his teeth sends a jolt of arousal through his body.

Capturing Darren's mouth in a frantic kiss, groaning at the slide of their tongues together, rocking his hips up, he sighs at the delicious pleasure being created in his body by Darren. Reaching down and clutching at Darren's hips, feeling the movement of them under his hands, Chris feels how much closer he is to his release.

"Dare," he quietly whines.

"Come, Chris. Come for me, baby," Darren whispers into his ear.

It's that endearment being whispered to him that makes him let go; he falls.

Arching his back and tipping his head back, pulling his lower lip between his teeth, he releases a soft moan as he comes. His orgasm is dizzying and leaves him with pleasure running through him. It's better than any one he's experienced alone.

Sighing into Darren's mouth when he captures his lips in a slow, languid kiss, he softly groans as he continues to move his hips against him until he comes.

"That...That was amazing." Chris drops his head back on the couch, smiling up at Darren with a blush still staining his cheeks. As Darren stares down at him, Chris notices his eyes change from ones filled with happiness and joy to ones filled with worry. It has his own worry growing in his mind. "What?" he asks in a soft voice.

"This was a mistake," Darren responds as he moves to climb off Chris. He scoots back until his back hits the arm of the couch, putting his hands up to stop Chris from coming closer. "Oh, my God," he groans as he drops his head in his hands. "I'm so fucking stupid."

"It's okay, Darren," Chris tries to say in a comforting, assuring voice. "I wanted to do that."

"You might have wanted to do that, but that doesn't mean we should have."

Chris' face falls at Darren's words. "Do...Do you not want me?" he asks with a low voice; he turns his attention to his hands in his lap.

"Oh, God! No!" Darren scoots a bit closer to Chris and takes his hands. "Chris, trust me, I want you. Damn, Chris, I want you more than anything I've ever known. What we did was fantastic, but it shouldn't have happened."

"Why?"

"Why?" Darren repeats with a small chuckle. "Other than the fact that you're seventeen and I'm twenty-eight, or the fact that you're my student?"

"That's all," Chris says sounding a bit relieved, thinking it was something extreme. "You made it out to be worse than it was."

"Chris," Darren groans, "I just broke the law. It's the worst thing possible."

"Only if someone finds out."

"That doesn't make me feel any better."

"What can I do to ease your mind?" Chris scoots until he's almost sitting in Darren's lap. Leaning over, he captures Darren's mouth in a slightly urgent, hungry kiss. Climbing into Darren's lap, wrapping his arms around his neck, he grins. "Better?" he mumbles as he starts to kiss along Darren's jaw.

He lets out a soft moan when he barely rocks his hips down on Darren's.

"Wait...No! No!" Darren grabs Chris' hips and forces him off, pushing a little too hard and causing him to fall back on the couch.

"What?" Chris says confused.

"We can't do that again," Darren heavily pants as he pushes off Chris.

"Like ever again? 'Cause that would really suck." Chris pushes up on to his elbows.

"No," Darren chuckles, "not like ever again. Just not as long as you're seventeen."

"I'm fucking seven-almost eight-months from my birthday! That's too long to wait."

"Actually, I take that back."

"Thank you! Because I can't wait eight months to do that again."

"We won't be doing that, or anything else, until you graduate."

Chris falls back against the couch in an annoyed, and slightly frustrated, heap. "You're trying to kill me," he grumpily complains.

"No. I'm trying not to get in trouble." Darren moves to hover over him.

"This is already trouble," Chris points out, arching an eyebrow.

"And it's enough of a risk as it is. So, any way to refrain from getting into more trouble, I'm doing it."

"Which is by not doing me."

"Yes." Darren chuckles as he stands up. "I'll get you a change of clothes."

"Thanks." He's a bit pissed that Darren pretty much put a stop to their physical relationship before it really started, but he understands. It's for the best. But the moment he has that diploma in his hand, he's rushing to Darren's house to be

Pulling out his phone and pulling up the calendar, he clicks on the day of his graduation eight months from now. Typing in three exclamation points on the date, discreet enough that no one will think he's referring to anything else but graduating, he closes the calendar.

Looking up and finding Darren walking back, already changed into sweats and a loose, dark plain shirt, he stands up and takes the clothes he offers him. He tells him where the bathroom is, and asks what he would like to drink.

"I'll take a glass of red wine," Chris replies to be cheeky, grinning at Darren.

"I just committed one felony. I'm not adding providing alcohol to a minor to my growing list of felonies." Darren nervously rubs the back of his neck. "So, it's either Coke or water."

"I'll take a Coke, then." Chris can see the nerves and fear plainly written on Darren's face. It doesn't take a genius for him to know what it's about. "I won't tell anybody, Dare," he whispers as he takes a step closer to Darren. "I wouldn't do that to you."

"I know. I know." Darren wraps his arms around Chris' waist and pulls him close to his body; dropping his forehead to Chris', he closes his eyes. "I know you wouldn't. But...If somebody found out."

"Hey, nobody is going to find out." Chris stares into Darren's eyes when he opens them. "Nobody is going to discover us, or know about this. My mouth is sealed on what just happened."

"Thanks." Darren exhales in a relieved breath.

"Except for Linden. I'm telling her." Chris laughs at the look that crosses Darren's face. It's one of fear and worry.

"Chris!"

He smiles at how worried Darren is. "I'm kidding. I promise." Laughing when Darren starts to tickle him, saying it's payback, Chris tries to back away, but only finds himself pressed up against a wall.

Sighing into the kiss Darren gives him after he stops tickling him; Chris wraps an arm around Darren's neck. Parting his lips and welcoming the gentle thrust of Darren's tongue into his mouth, massaging their tongues together. "I'm telling her, though. About us," he whispers after Darren breaks the kiss. Instantly, he feels Darren tense against him.

"Chris, you can't do that," Darren warns him.

"I know. I meant after I graduate. That day, I want to tell her."

"Why?"

"She's my best friend," Chris tells him. "I'd like her to know."

"How do you think she'll react?" Darren pushes off Chris and puts a bit of space between them.

"I have no fucking clue." Chris chuckles as he picks up the pants he dropped. "But I can't wait to find out."

"I don't entirely think that's a good idea." Darren lets out a huff.

"Hey, it'll be fine," Chris whispers in a comforting voice as he steps close to Darren. "She won't tell anyone if I ask her to."

"Are you sure?" Darren asks concerned.

"Yes. After some time, we can tell everybody else."

"Alright." It's then Darren looks at him as his eyes fill with a hint of wonder and amusement. "Who's to say we'll even still be together at the end of the school year. I could get tired of you, or vice versa."

"Yeah right." Chris snorts. "The only thing you'll get tired of is waiting to hit this."

"Oh, my God!" Darren burst out laughing, grabbing at his side. "Did you literally use the term "hit this" to describe me sleeping with you?"

"Yes," Chris replies, quietly laughing along with Darren. "What did they say in the ye olden days, Old Man: Share my bed?"

"Ouch! The first joke about my age." Darren pretends to be hurt. "I should remind you that I'm only twenty-eight."

"Alright, Old Man," Chris teases. "I should go, it's seven-thirty. Way past your bedtime." Turning on his heel and walking to the bathroom to change, Chris lets out a small scream when Darren suddenly grabs him, spins him around, and lifts him up. Instantly wrapping his legs around Darren's waist, winding his arms around his neck, Chris looks into his eyes filled with amusement and desire.

"Who's old now?" Darren muses as he holds tight to Chris.

"Definitely not you," Chris replies as he leans in and kisses Darren. Softly humming as he tentatively dips his tongue past soft, full lips, he faintly moans when Darren flicks his tongue over his.

Lost in the kiss, Chris lets out a small oomph when Darren backs him up against a wall. Barely being hefted up some, holding tight to Darren as he supports him, he releases a ragged breath against Darren's mouth when he feels hands grab at his ass. Whining low in his throat at Darren's hands gently massaging the flesh of his ass. But as quick as he starts, he feels him stopping.

"Why'd you stop?" Chris inquires as he catches his breath after Darren pulls back from the kiss.

"Because we've already gone too far once tonight. And because we have a date to finish."

Wishing they didn't have to stop, Chris understands and accepts where Darren is coming from on the physical side of their...relationship, he figures he would call it. Pondering what they are, mulling it over some in his mind, he furrows his brows together in wonder.

"What?" Darren asks as he takes a small step back, just enough so Chris can safely step on to the floor.

"Are we in a relationship?" Chris asks in curiosity. "Are we together? And if so, does that mean you're my boyfriend?"

"I hope so. I would like that very much," Darren answers as he brushes a strand of hair away from Chris' forehead.

"Huh!" Chris huffs, looking a bit disappointed.

"What?" Darren chuckles.

"I just thought...I thought you would ask me. Don't get me wrong, I love that I'm your boyfriend, and vice versa." Chris blushes at that admission. "I just wanted to be asked."

"Sorry," Darren apologizes. "I should have asked."

"It's okay. I just like knowing that your mine now."

Darren leans over and kisses Chris, gently cupping his cheek, and making his heart race. "I like knowing your mine, as well," he whispers after resting his forehead to Chris'.

Chris smiles wide at that. "How about I go change, and we finally finish our date," he suggests.

"Okay," Darren replies.

Three hours later standing in Darren's kitchen kissing goodbye, which they've been doing for ten minutes already, Chris finally musters enough willpower to push away from Darren. "I have to go," he breathlessly tells him.

"Okay." Darren cups his cheek and moves in to softly kiss him. "I'll call you tomorrow."

"Alright." Smiling at Darren, feeling happy, Chris knows it's time for him to leave. "Bye, Dare."

"Bye."

Heading to the garage and to his car, Chris turns when Darren calls his name behind him. "Yeah?"

"I was wondering if you'd answer something for me."

"Sure." Chris nods his head.

"I wanted to know if you'd like to be my boyfriend?" Darren smiles, lifting an eyebrow.

"Oh! I don't know. You see, I already have somebody," Chris teases, biting his lower lip as he grins.

"Is that so?" Darren asks as he moves over to Chris.

"Yup." Chris nods his head, reaching out and fingering the hem of Darren's shirt. "He's pretty great."

"How great?" Darren steps close to Chris until he's pressed back against the car door.

Trying to focus on something that isn't the press of Darren's body to his, Chris breathes to calm his now racing heart. "He...He makes me happy."

"Happy? That's good. You deserve happiness in your life."

Chris sighs when Darren softly brushes his lips over his neck. "Yeah," he agrees. "He also makes me feel beautiful."

"He better." Darren lifts his head and grazes his lips over Chris' slightly parted ones. "You deserve to know how gorgeous you are."

Moaning when Darren flicks the tip of his tongue over his top lip, Chris reaches up and plants his hands on Darren's chest, feeling defined muscles under his hands. "H-He...He," he stutters, lost in a tizzy of many emotions. "He makes me feel alive."

"Well," Darren mumbles against Chris' lips, "it seems I'm out of luck. He seems like a great guy who's lucky to have you."

"I was thinking the same thing." Quietly sighing when Darren kisses him, curling his fingers against his chest, Chris flutters his eyes closed and pushes his tongue into Darren's mouth after he parts his lips. "Yes," he heavily pants when he ends the kiss.

"What?"

"Yes, I'll be your boyfriend," he clarifies for Darren.

Darren chuckles as he kisses Chris one more time before he leaves.

* * *

Closing the front door of his house behind him, hanging his keys up on the hook, Chris starts to walk to his room. Saying hi to his mom as he passes her sitting on the couch watching some movie, he stops when she abruptly calls his name.

"Yeah?" He turns to face her.

"What happened? Why are you wearing different pants?"

Of course she would notice something like that. He quickly thinks up of a believable lie. "I spilled something on my jeans. So, I thought it would be easier to just buy some new pants than walk around wearing jeans with a stain." He mentally pats himself on the back for that one. Technically, it's not far from the truth.

Letting out a relieved breath when his mom buys the lie, he tells her goodnight and goes to his room. As he walks, he's thankful Darren didn't give him sweatpants with his college name on them. There would have been no way to explain that.

Collapsing on his bed, big smile on his face, still feeling flushed from everything, Chris slowly falls asleep with thoughts of Darren and what happened tonight running through his mind.


End file.
